'Failure is proof that desire wasn't strong enough'. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

#failure #proof #desire #wasn

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this

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contemporary era, numerous individuals are highly ambitious and have the tendency to get what they want

however

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, it is argued that lack of passion is the prime reason to fail. I completely disagree with

this

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notion because several factors contribute to gaining control over things.

To begin

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with,

Although

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strong willpower is the greatest key to success, many men and women tend to fail in several phases of their

Use synonyms

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

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. It is often the case that socio-economic conditions and

deprive

Replace the word

deprivation

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of family support deter creatures like humans from chasing their

dream

Fix the agreement mistake

dreams

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, putting them in a miserable situation where they can no longer have the ability to achieve their goals.

For example

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, A lower class from Jumla, Nepal wanted to become a pilot and had a strong desire to attain her dream but,

due to

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poverty, she couldn't

fulfill

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fulfil

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her dream.

Thus

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, evidence explicitly shows that hundreds of thousands of

people

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across

south

Capitalize word

South

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Asia are taken aback

from

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show examples

their big dreams because of financial instabilities.

Moreover

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, inevitable situations hinder

people

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from accomplishing their desired state of goals. In fact,

people

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actually amount to what they want to obtain in

life

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and regardless of continuous effort and discipline, they encounter multifarious obstacles in their lives which

causes

Correct subject-verb agreement

cause

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constant failure.

For instance

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, serious health

issue

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issues

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like depression, stroke and

accident

Fix the agreement mistake

accidents

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restrains

people

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from victory or seamlessly sticking to their goals. Another instance,

example

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for example

show examples

Change preposition

apply

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my recently assigned patient in the hospital who had a sudden brain injury, was highly ambitious and confident in his

life

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so,

although

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his critical medical condition refrained him from going abroad for

further

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studies even though he had a granted visa.

Hence

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, a piece of real evidence shows that

people

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did not get to smoothly chase after their dreams even if they wanted to.

To conclude

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people

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are often evaluated on whether they have strong willpower, and winning and losing are not solely measured by his or her level of passion I firmly believe that , it is mainly the socioeconomic status and inevitable circumstances in

life

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Submitted by asmitakhatri490 on Sat Jan 27 2024

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introduction conclusion present

Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines your stance on the topic and that your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points, reinforcing your argument.

logical structure

Work on creating a more logically structured essay by ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph are well connected to this main idea.

relevant specific examples

Include more specific examples and evidence throughout your essay to support your points, which can make your argument more compelling.

complete response

To achieve a higher score in task achievement, make sure to fully address all parts of the task, including the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement, and develop your ideas fully with a clear progression throughout the essay.

clear comprehensive ideas

Clarify and develop your ideas more comprehensively to ensure that the reader can easily follow and understand your argument without ambiguity.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

341 words

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'Failure is proof that desire wasn't strong enough'. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

The huge increase in the number of people with illnesses caused by air pollution from motor vehicles has led to calls for all motorised vehicles to be banned from town and city centres. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this suggestion ?

In many cities, there is little control on the design and construction of new houses. Some people think that people can choose to build houses in their own styles instead of building them the same as the old house style in local areas. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

: Some people think that Olympic games are exciting events that bring other nations together. Others say Olympics is a waste of money and the money could be better spent on other things. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Fossil fuel is the main source of energy. In some countries, the use of alternative sources of energy is encouraged. To what extent do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Nowadays, many people have to work longer hours, and they feel more stressed out than before. What are the reasons? What can employers do to make their employees' lives easier?