IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some expert believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary. Do the advantage of this outweigh the disadvantage?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is a common belief that
children
Use synonyms
 should start learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 at primary
school
Use synonyms
 rather than in high
school
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, there is a more persuasive argument that
children
Use synonyms
 should not learn a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 from a young age. A discussion of
this
Linking Words
 issue
as well as
Linking Words
 my thoughts, will be highlighted in the write-up. On the one hand, learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 brings two main benefits to
children
Use synonyms
. First of all, young ones have more absorption abilities than the others.
This
Linking Words
 is because a lot of reports have shown that
children
Use synonyms
 ages 4-8 have a higher ability to study another
language
Use synonyms
 but their mother tongue.
As a consequence
Linking Words
, it will help them to learn more than one or two foreign
languages
Use synonyms
 which is good for their future. Another advantage of learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 is that they can communicate with others who come from exotic countries.
In other words
Linking Words
, the more
languages
Use synonyms
 they can learn, the more cultures they can learn about.
For instance
Linking Words
, when
children
Use synonyms
 travel to a foreign country, they are more likely to make local friends if they can speak the local
languages
Use synonyms
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, the disadvantages of
children
Use synonyms
 learning foreign
languages
Use synonyms
 in early
school
Use synonyms
 cannot be ignored.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
children
Use synonyms
 may gain extra pressure in their
school
Use synonyms
 life.
This
Linking Words
 is because there are more important subjects in
school
Use synonyms
 they should focus on.
For example
Linking Words
, doing maths is most students' nightmares, they have to put more effort into finishing that with much study time.
Moreover
Linking Words
, learning a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 is not a necessary lesson for many
children
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is because not many families can afford the money to put a child to learn other
languages
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, in many countries, parents cannot even pay the basic education fee for their
children
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 many believe that
children
Use synonyms
 should learn a foreign
language
Use synonyms
 in their primary
school
Use synonyms
 because they can absorb the
language
Use synonyms
 as soon as they can,
in addition
Linking Words
, they are more likely to go out into the world and make more friends.
However
Linking Words
, I still think that it is not a parent's responsibility to improve their
children
Use synonyms
 to learn an unnecessary
language
Use synonyms
 or subject, they could learn it when they have the ability.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Ensure an effective introduction and conclusion that clearly state your opinion. The opinion was somewhat unclear, making it difficult to discern your stance on the issue.
supported main points
Develop paragraphs with clear central ideas, ensuring each is fully expanded with explanations or examples. Some points were briefly mentioned without deep exploration.
complete response
Address the task fully by providing a balanced discussion of advantages and disadvantages before reaching a reasoned conclusion. The essay could explore the counter-arguments more thoroughly to strengthen the response.
clear comprehensive ideas
Strive to include a range of sentence structures and vocabulary suited to academic writing. Varied language use enriches your essay and demonstrates linguistic skill.
relevant specific examples
Use specific examples to support your arguments. Including more detailed illustrations can strengthen your essay and make your points more persuasive.
logical structure
Organize ideas logically, using cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs. The essay can benefit from improved transitions and clearer connections between points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: