Do you agree with gun possession in public to protect lives ?

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There has been an increasing number of crimes breaking out in today’s society and some of them even lead to loss of life. Under the circumstances, some advocate for legalising

gun

possession

so as to protect themselves and their families.

However

, I strongly argue that the introduction of

this

law will aggregate the situation, as the level of crime will be far more violent, resulting in the

police

not being able to ensure the safety of public citizens.

To begin

gun

possession

in the public domain will significantly increase the average crime level. As it stands, the process of owning a private

gun

is rigorous in most countries,

as a result

, few incidents involve

gun

usage.

However

, if the government enforced the law, it can be easily anticipated that more and more criminals would threaten to murder people in order to attain their missions.

Hence

, the more prevalent

gun

possession

is, the more dire crimes will occur.

Additionally

, the ubiquity of

gun

possessions will bring a substantial challenge to the

police

. As a general rule, it is only the

police

that can own guns. In light of

this

, criminals are inclined to be intimated by the

police

’s actions as there is a chance of them being shot

while

committing a crime.

Nevertheless

, with criminals having their own guns, they can now equally combat the

police

, which induces losing the

police

’s power and authority.

Hence

, no authorities can guarantee the safety of the public. In conclusion, from my perspective, not only does

gun

possession

elevate the rate of crimes involving

gun

usage, but it will

also

deprive the

police

of their vital function.

Thus

, I believe that general citizens should not be allowed to have a

gun

for their own protection.

Submitted by artical5er7 on Mon Jan 29 2024

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Task Achievement

Ensure that each paragraph contains a clear main idea that is directly related to the question, and expand on this with specific examples to strengthen your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

Develop paragraphing skills by starting with a topic sentence followed by supporting sentences and a concluding sentence that neatly ties back to the topic to enhance logical flow and clarity.

Coherence and Cohesion

Incorporate a wider range of linking words and phrases to improve the connections between ideas and paragraphs, enhancing overall coherence.

Language

Use more varied and complex sentence structures to demonstrate language proficiency and fluidity in expressing ideas.

Task Achievement

Consider examining both sides of the argument, even if you are taking a clear position, to demonstrate an understanding of different perspectives, which enriches task response.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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Do you agree with gun possession in public to protect lives ?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think it’s better to choose friends who always have the same opinions as them. Other people believe it’s good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Social media is becoming increasingly popular amongst all age groups. However, sharing personal information on social media websites does have a risk. Do you think that advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people believe that funding space exploration is important. To what extent do you agree?

The world population has been increasing lately. One way to curb excessive growth in the third world countries is to restrict the number of children each couple can have to 1. Other people believe that empowerment of womanis a better way. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railyway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believ ethe money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion