IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

the first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Austratlian household.the second charts shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features , and make comparisons where relevant

the first chart below shows how energy is used in an average Austratlian household.the second charts shows the greenhouse gas emissions which result from this energy use. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features , and make comparisons where relevant
The first pie
chart
Use synonyms
 illustrates the
energy
Use synonyms
 which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 used in
an average houses
Correct the article-noun agreement
an average house
average houses
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
Ausrtalia
Correct your spelling
Australia
 and the second pie
chart
Use synonyms
 presents
he
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
data's
Change noun form
data
show examples
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 greenhouse gas
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
show examples
 which outcome from
this
Linking Words
energy
Use synonyms
 use.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the major components of
energy
Use synonyms
 from both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
pie
Use synonyms
chart
Fix the agreement mistake
charts
show examples
 are water heating and heating process were averaged in
households
Use synonyms
 of
Australia
Use synonyms
. The majority of
households
Use synonyms
 in
Australia
Use synonyms
were used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 heating and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water heating is less
by
Change preposition
than
show examples
 12% of the heating.The refrigeration of the houses took 7% of the
energy
Use synonyms
 use.
Likewise
Linking Words
,the
energy
Use synonyms
 used in the other appliances in the
households
Use synonyms
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 15% .Other than these , the lighting and cooling have 2% and $% respectively that are used in the
Australia
Use synonyms
 houses.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
 water heating has the highest emissions rather than the other
enegies
Correct your spelling
energy
 that
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 used.Compared to the first
pies
Change the noun form
pie
show examples
chart
Use synonyms
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
 refrigeration has doubled the percentage of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
usage .In the same way,there is an increase in the other appliances that are used in an average
Use synonyms
households
Correct the article-noun agreement
household
show examples
 in
Australia
Use synonyms

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, energy, households, australia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • average household
  • energy consumption
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • correlation
  • environmental impact
  • heating
  • cooling
  • appliances
  • sustainability
  • emissions
  • energy-efficient
  • carbon footprint
  • renewable energy
  • insulation
  • electricity
  • gas
  • comparison
  • significant
  • implications
  • policy
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