IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The table below gives information about a bakery's average sales in three different branches in 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main ifeatures, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The table below gives information about a bakery's average sales in three different branches in 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main ifeatures, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#information #bakery #sales #three #branches #summarise #ifeatures #comparisons
The table depicts information about the rates of bakery sales in three stores in 2015, broken down into five different criteria.
Overall
, it is noticeable that the highest value is in
London
 Covent Garden,
while
 the lowest number is in
London
St
John’s
Wood
. It is
also
 interesting to note that all of the stores have different popular items. With regards to
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 number of transactions,
London
 Covent Garden achieved the highest contribution for 642 transactions as opposed to
London
St
John’s
Wood
 which had nearly less than a third by 269.
Similarly
, the former
also
 contributed the largest transaction value at 7.58 pounds compared to two other stores which had less value at 4.51 pounds and 5.01 pounds in
London
 Oxford Circus and in
London
St
John’s
Wood
 respectively.
Furthermore
, the rest of the criteria about
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 number of eat-in and takeaway sales had the same trend with the first store achieving the highest proportion of more than 300 transactions. In terms of the popularity of items that have been sold, the croissant was the most interesting bakery in the first store,
while
 medium latte was the most sold out in the second store.
Moreover
, in
London
St
John’s
Wood
, buyers preferred to purchase strawberry tarts.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words london, st, john’s, wood with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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