n some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

#n #countries #people #work #travel #year #school #university #studies

In various nations worldwide, the concept of taking a gap year before commencing tertiary education has gained popularity, with many people advocating for it as an opportunity to work or travel.

While

this

approach offers certain advantages, it is essential to consider the accompanying disadvantages as well. There are two primary benefits associated with enlistment engaging in travel or work before pursuing university education.

Firstly

, travelling enables a woman to broaden their horizons. By venturing abroad, recruitment is exposed to diverse cultures and customs, fostering a deeper understanding of the world.

Additionally

, admission who choose to effort during

this

period develops an appreciation for the value of money. Through firsthand experience, they realize the effort required to earn a living, leading to a more thoughtful and less impulsive approach to spending.

On the other hand

, several drawbacks deserve attention.

Firstly

, travelling may trigger feelings of homesickness. Many enlistment have not been separated from their families and friends before, making them susceptible to missing these important relationships. In extreme cases, individuals may even experience depression.

Furthermore

, admissions who engage in

trial

Fix the agreement mistake

trials

show examples

during their gap year might lose the motivation to return to their studies. The allure of financial independence and the enjoyment of earning money could divert them from pursuing higher education.

Consequently

this

could have a negative impact on their future prospects, as having a degree has become increasingly crucial for competitiveness in the job market. In conclusion, taking a gap year can provide students with invaluable experiences and the opportunity to develop financial independence.

However

, it is important to recognize the potential for homesickness and the risk of enlistment and not continuing their studies.

Therefore

, it is crucial to carefully evaluate the benefits and drawbacks before making a decision regarding whether students should embark on

such

an adventure. By considering these factors, entities can make informed choices that align with their personal circumstances and aspirations.

Submitted by zaidamrat5 on Tue Jan 30 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, ensure that you have a logical flow of ideas from introduction to conclusion. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to create a seamless transition between paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

Consider writing an introduction that more directly addresses the question, and make sure your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay without introducing new ideas.

task achievement

Try to provide a more balanced discussion of advantages and disadvantages by dedicating equal development to each. Then, ensure a complete response to the task by clearly stating your position or opinion in both the introduction and the conclusion.

task achievement

To provide clearer and more comprehensive ideas, delve deeper into each point you are making. Avoid being too general; instead, offer detailed explanations that convey a full understanding of the topic.

task achievement

Enhance your essay by including more relevant and specific examples to support your points. Personal anecdotes or referencing specific countries or studies can make your arguments more convincing and engaging.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

316 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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n some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Fully explain your ideas

Increasing the petrol price is the best way to reducing traffic and pollution problems. agree and disagree.

Modern cultures around the world have become similar when compared to the past. What are the reasons. Is it a positive or negative development?

some people work for the same organisation all their working life. others think that it is better to work for different organisation. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The Bar Chart shows CO2 emissions for different forms of transport in the European Union. The Pie Chart shows the percentage of European Union funds being spent on different forms of transport.