IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Recently, several individuals have argued that the
extinction
Use synonyms
 of certain classes of flora and fauna is a leading cause of the primary ecological issues.
However
Linking Words
, another group believes that there are more serious concerns in our nature. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will explain
further
Linking Words
 from both points of view and provide my opinion in the upcoming paragraph. On one hand, the endangerment of various flora and fauna has impacts on environmental balance. When the natural cycle is interrupted, it automatically shifts the ecosystem because every living thing is interconnected. For exemplify, massive tuna fishing in the ocean results in top predators like whales losing their diet resources even though tuna is not their consumption.
As a result
Linking Words
, whales are
also
Linking Words
 threatened with
extinction
Use synonyms
, and we risk losing a massive carbon dioxide absorber.
Moreover
Linking Words
, plants that serve the same role in producing oxygen and absorbing carbon dioxide decrease when their ecosystems are disrupted and taken away.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, many others are opposed and believe that the
extinction
Use synonyms
 of certain living things is not the main issue. There are more urgent problems,
such
Linking Words
 as global climate or unsustainable source energy, because it has a direct impact on human activities. Global warming disrupts the cycle of seasonal changes, resulting in extended drought or massive floods. It means
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the agricultural products are depleted, leading to a shortage of human food resources.
Moreover
Linking Words
, society is
also
Linking Words
 concerned about energy sources, especially since we still rely on unclean sources. It emits much more greenhouse gases and damages the ozone layer.
That is
Linking Words
 why some people prioritize addressing other environmental issues over the
extinction
Use synonyms
 of flora and fauna.
To sum up
Linking Words
, the
extinction
Use synonyms
 of certain animals and plants,
along with
Linking Words
 other environmental issues, shares equivalent importance. They represent interconnected components of the Earth's cycles, where instability in one cycle disrupts the others.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Be sure to include a clear thesis statement that reflects your opinion in your introduction to guide the reader.
task response
Work on expanding your examples with detailed explanation to fully support your main points.
coherence and cohesion
Aim for clarity in paragraph structure; each paragraph should contain one clear main idea, followed by supporting details and examples.
coherence and cohesion
Use a range of linking words to connect ideas within and across paragraphs to improve the flow of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Restate your opinion in the conclusion to clearly signal the end of your discussion and reinforce your viewpoint.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
What to do next:
Look at other essays: