Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #museums #art #galleries #objects #works #computer

Museums and art galleries play a significant role in portraying the culture of one nation.

However

, few argue that it is not needed as everybody can see artefacts online via their computers. In my opinion, I would clearly disagree with

this

notion.

This

essay will depict both views. To commence with, in favour of my opinion, history and historical monuments or museums always enhance the beauty of each country.

Besides

, it brings economy

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and celebrates the uniqueness of the particular country. It's better to be seen by bare eyes to observe and feel the fine art which can not be replaced by the computerised image.

For example

, the real feel of the colours and carving of the terracotta army would be only able to feel physical, as the computerised images would not be able to give distinct details.

Furthermore

, it helps to increase tourism in every nation. On the other side of the spectrum, few people believe that

due to

advancements in technology, one can see anything in one click so, it does not make sense to spend money on travel and visit historical places.

For instance

, the Taj Mahal people can see in 3D view through the computer from any corner of the world, which is located in Delhi India.

Moreover

, humans can not damage

this

property as it can not be touched.

To sum up

, my opinion shows the inclination towards the former viewpoint as it captivates the cultural and historical audacity in the population.

Submitted by joshiami7570 on Wed Jan 31 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively outline the writer's position. However, to enhance coherence, ensure there is a logical progression between paragraphs by using cohesive devices to better link ideas, and diversify sentence structures for improved readability.

task achievement

To strengthen task achievement, extend and deepen the main points by providing more specific examples and evidence for your arguments. Address the task prompt directly and ensure that each body paragraph fully develops a single clear point, relevant to the task.

Word Count

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A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

247 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

virtual
digital
online
accessibility
inclusivity
cultural heritage
physical experience
immersion
local tourism
economy

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Some people claim that museums and art galleries are not needed today because everyone can see historical objects or art works by computer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that visiting museums is the best way for children to learn history, while many others think there are several better ways. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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