Nowadays some older people choose to live in retirement communities and centres with other people, rather than living with their adult children. What is the reason for this and what are the solutions for this?

#people #retirement #communities #centres #adult #children #reason

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In the present days some senior

people

prefer living in the retirement community and centre with other

people

than with their

grown up

Add a hyphen

grown-up

show examples

sons and daughters.

This

due to

their need not only to join

people

of their same age profile but

also

give

Fix the infinitive

to give

show examples

the mature children freedom to lead their own life.

This

essay,

however

Add the comma(s)

however,

show examples

will not only discuss the reasons for their choice but

then

air out

solution

Fix the agreement mistake

solutions

show examples

for them. It is of great benefit that after stopping working, the elderly enjoin groups and centres with other

people

firstly

, to

refreshen

Verb problem

freshen

show examples

up after years of toiling under the sun by sharing common experiences.

Additionally

as a result

of leaving their home, they leave behind full-grown children with the power of controlling and managing the home.

This

has

moreover

, benefited the two groups in a positive way. With regard to the

forementioned

Correct your spelling

aforementioned

show examples

points, it is wise to allow the

aging

Change the spelling

ageing

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parents

live

Fix the infinitive

to live

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freely in their

preffered

Correct your spelling

preferred

community facilities retiring as it comes with its advantages.

However

this

should be considered

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

free will as they should never be forced to join the group. As an example, circumstances should not force them to go there.

For instance

, some decide to settle there

due to

improper care that they receive from their mature children.

To conclude

, the option for parents to leave home and join peers is perfect since they get to share common feelings and experiences and should be

put

Verb problem

taken

show examples

into consideration as long as proper care is offered to them.

Submitted by rebecckwamboka96 on Thu Feb 01 2024

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task achievement

Expand on the points mentioned, providing relevant examples and clearer explanations to improve task achievement. For instance, discuss specific benefits that retirement communities offer and how they cater to the needs of the elderly, or explore situations where the elderly might not receive the care they need from their families.

coherence cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that ideas are logically connected. Use transitional phrases to link sentences and paragraphs smoothly. Avoid repetition and aim for variety in linguistic expression.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

252 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

retirement communities
independence
burden
specialized services
healthcare
family structures
engaged
social opportunities
financial feasibility
government support
in-home care services
intergenerational
workplace policies
subsidiary
community-based services
technology-based solutions

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Nowadays some older people choose to live in retirement communities and centres with other people, rather than living with their adult children. What is the reason for this and what are the solutions for this?

Fully explain your ideas

More and more people are becoming seriously overweight. Some people think a solution can be to increase the price of fattening foods. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, many children in western countries are obese. What are the causes and solutions to this problem?

Many think that religion should be taught in schools while others think it should be avoided. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

In your opinion how can the government of each country eradicate or lessen the crimes committed by their own people? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

More and more people nowadays visit well-known places to take photographs of themselves, without looking at the place. Why do you think this happen? Is it a positive or negative trend?