some people think that dangerous sports should be banned, but others think the people should have freedom to choose sports activities discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #sports #freedom #activities

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One of the most prevalent trends in the contemporary world is the cumulative increase in boxing and many more

games

Use synonyms

to get a name and fame. A proportion of individuals believe health risky

games

Use synonyms

should stopped;

however

Linking Words

, some think it is their personal decision to take part in

sports

Use synonyms

. Both sides of

this

Linking Words

topic will be carefully analysed before constructing an inference. On one hand, it is believed by many people that dangerous activities are always risky for players,

while

Linking Words

they are playing

games

Use synonyms

, athletes lose their body parts and lives during events,

for example

Linking Words

, boxing, wrestling and many more plays destroy the opponent’s physical body parts.

As a result

Linking Words

, it is evident why many gravitate towards

this

Linking Words

argument.

However

Linking Words

on the other hand

Linking Words

, it is believed , that everybody has the right to choose what

games

Use synonyms

they want to play. They are already aware of the pros and cons of the game. Some people want to get popular with

sports

Use synonyms

and players become overnight popular worldwide and earn good money to enjoy a healthy life.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, some wrestlers play wrestling which involves risks, but with professional training and better medications, sportspersons recover quickly.

For instance

Linking Words

, Mike Tyson was a famous boxer who won many world events and he became a celebrity and nowadays he is making heaps of money.

As a consequence

Linking Words

, it is apparent why some show a penchant towards

this

Linking Words

perception. In summary, following the analysis of both sides,

it is clear that

Linking Words

sports

Use synonyms

are always life-threatening unless played in a professional manner.

Further

Linking Words

, it is recommended that name and fame are not easy to get until put in some effort at a professional level and make good money. As a prediction, the play of hazardous

sports

Use synonyms

will continue in the future.

Submitted by rbtech65 on Thu Feb 01 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, try to organize your paragraphs with clear topic sentences and make sure each paragraph flows logically from one to the next. Use a range of cohesive devices (e.g., linking words, pronouns) to connect ideas within and across paragraphs.

Task Achievement

For task achievement, ensure that you fully address all parts of the prompt. Discuss both views thoroughly and provide a balanced argument before stating your own opinion. Use relevant examples to illustrate your points and avoid generic statements.

Lexical Resource & Grammatical Range and Accuracy

Incorporate a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance the quality of the essay. This can also aid in conveying your ideas more effectively. Additionally, ensure that examples used are specific and clearly support your arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

prohibit
autonomy
adrenaline rush
resilience
subjective
informed decision
extreme sports
hazardous
regulation
legislation
thrill-seeking
risk assessment
safety measures
protective gear
inherent risks

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some people think that dangerous sports should be banned, but others think the people should have freedom to choose sports activities discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your opinion

How can we prevent child abuse (including physical abuse, emotional abuse, child labor,…)? Give your opinion and support it with reasons and examples taken from your reading, experience, or observation.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that music is just a form of entertainment, whilst others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered as they lose their habitat and some are even threatened to the point of extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What measure can be taken to deal with this problem?