You travelled by a long distance bus recently and your suitcase was damaged. Write a letter to the bus company. In your letter •Inform the bus company of when and to where you travelled •Describe your suitcase and what happened to it •Explain why the company should pay for a new suitcase
Dear Sir,
I am writing
this
letter to express my disappointment with the Linking Words
lauguage
handling service of Correct your spelling
language
you
bus company. I recently travelled for a long distance and later when I got my Correct pronoun usage
your
bag
it was whole Use synonyms
damanged
.
Let me explain Correct your spelling
damaged
you
, I Change preposition
to you
have
travelled from New Delhi to Ludhiana Unnecessary verb
apply
in
Bus number 765 Change preposition
on
on
Change preposition
apply
last
Sunday, 28th Linking Words
Janurary
2024. My black Safari Correct your spelling
January
bag
with Use synonyms
golden
zip lock and two pockets Correct article usage
a golden
infront
was in Correct your spelling
in front
a
good condition during boarding but when I reached the destination my Correct article usage
apply
bag
Use synonyms
has
a big Wrong verb form
had
dant
at the back and it could not be fixed. To recover my loss, I would like to get the Correct your spelling
dent
compensiation
amount Correct your spelling
compensation
that is
mentioned on your website. For my Linking Words
safety
I took some Add a comma
safety,
picture
of my Change the form of the verb
pictures
bag
at the beginning of the trip and Use synonyms
according to
your Linking Words
policy
I should Add a comma
policy,
atleast
get 60% of the original price of the Correct your spelling
at least
bag
.
I hope you will address Use synonyms
this
concern as soon as possible and Linking Words
would
not disappoint me anymore.
Your's sincerely,
RaviWrong verb form
will
Submitted by harneet2001kaur on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the letter could be improved by clearly separating information into distinct paragraphs, with each focusing on a specific point: one for the introduction and details of the journey, one for the description of the suitcase and the damage, and one for the request for compensation. This will make your argument more persuasive and easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Greeting and closing are well done, but they could be enhanced by addressing the recipient by their title (if known), such as Customer Service Manager, and signing off with a more formal closure if writing in a highly formal context.
task achievement
For task achievement, make sure to provide all necessary details such as the ticket number, exact date, and any additional evidence that would support your claim. Remember to be specific about what action you expect from the bus company, such as a direct request for a specific sum of money or a new suitcase.
task achievement
The writing tone is mostly suitable and formal. However, ensuring consistency in tone, using a consistently formal register, and avoiding informal phrases will create a more professional impression and make your request more persuasive.