IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledgement or experience.

#future #nobody #newspapers #books #knowledgement
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Nowadays,
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
 has an important role
of
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in
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 the digital world.
Everyone
Add a verb
Everyone is
Everyone was
show examples
 able to connect with the globe online including
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
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 and
books
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.
People
Use synonyms
 can access
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
everything
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
 and everywhere using only cellular data. I somewhat agree that in the next
generations
Add a comma
generations,
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 there will be no more physical
books
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 and newspapers. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
 I will explain why I believe
this
Linking Words
 idea.
Firstly
Linking Words
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
libraries develop an application and purchase the
books
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 online for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
readers from all over the world.
This
Linking Words
is give
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gives
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 a lot of
benefit
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benefits
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for
Change preposition
to
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 buyers who are interested in various
type
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types
show examples
Use synonyms
books
Change preposition
of books
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able
Correct word choice
and able
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 to do everything in one click.
For example
Linking Words
, there is an application
call
Change the form of the verb
called
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 'TK Park' which is a public library online for
people
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 in every
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
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 to access and read
books
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 using only
smartphone
Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
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 and
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, Many
people
Use synonyms
 will disagree with the idea above. Some of the readers especially the elders love to spend their time
to explore
Change the verb form
exploring
show examples
 different
books
Use synonyms
 in the bookstore and
smell
Wrong verb form
smelling
show examples
 the
piece
Fix the agreement mistake
pieces
show examples
 of
papers
Fix the agreement mistake
paper
show examples
. In conclusion, I believe that
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Change the article
a
show examples
 few years later it
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
 be
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 different world for the global trend of reading. There will be
Correct article usage
a large
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large
Correct article usage
a large
show examples
 amount of online
books
Use synonyms
 and
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
 for the readers to enjoy. But I think there will be
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
room for the
people
Use synonyms
 who enjoy
read
Wrong verb form
reading
show examples
 real
books
Use synonyms
 and newspapers.
Submitted by Poookiiee on

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Task Achievement
Ensure that your introduction clearly outlines your view. While you mentioned that you 'somewhat agree,' it would be clearer if you elaborated on this stance a bit more.
Task Achievement
Work on developing your main points with more elaborate explanations and examples. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, followed by supporting details and examples.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve the coherence, make sure each paragraph has clear transitions and link words that smoothly guide the reader through your argument.
Task Achievement
Provide a balanced discussion by examining both sides of the argument and giving equal development to your reasons for agreement and disagreement.
Task Achievement
Use a wider range of grammatical structures and vocabulary to demonstrate language flexibility and precision.
Coherence & Cohesion
End your essay with a stronger conclusion that summarizes your points and reiterates your stance in a compelling way.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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