Some people say that advertising is extremely succesfull at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion
Nowadays, advertising
is take
Change the verb form
is taking
is taken
very
important role Add an article
a very
for
sales and marketing. It is easy and convenient for the company to promote products through Change preposition
in
the
online channels like Facebook or TikTok which most Correct article usage
apply
of
Change preposition
apply
the
people Correct article usage
apply
seen
it Wrong verb form
see
everyday
. Replace the word
every day
Although
, it could be something common and they no longer look at the commercials. In Correct word choice
However
this
essay, I will examine both of this
opinions and why I strongly support the first idea.
In my point of view, the main reason is advertising Correct determiner usage
these
are
coming from various Change the verb form
is
type
of Fix the agreement mistake
types
medias
. Many people just enjoy their leisure time watching Correct your spelling
media
video
on YouTube or TV programs and subconsciously perceive the information about the products and think they might need it. Fix the agreement mistake
videos
Secondly
, admit it or not celebrities are huge
influence on customers to buy the Add an article
a huge
staffs
Correct your spelling
stuff
such
as Lisa, the
member of Correct article usage
a
famous
Correct article usage
the famous
K- Pop
girl group called 'Black Pink'. She has 100 Correct your spelling
K-pop
millions
followers on Change to singular
million
instagram
and only she Change the capitalization
Instagram
post
the picture of her with Change the verb form
posts
inhaler
that thing becoming very popular Add an article
an inhaler
over
Change preposition
apply
a
night.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, marketing could be sometime
very boring and annoying. Because advertising is now everywhere. They have seen it too many times until they get used to it and pay attention no more. Fix the agreement mistake
sometimes
For example
, when you use sky
train every day in Bangkok, you must have seen the commercial picture wrap outside and inside of that train and it Correct article usage
the sky
probably
too much for you.
In conclusion, we have nowhere to escape from Add a missing verb
is probably
this
advertising world because it's super easy for the company to post and promote their products online in our daily life
. That's why I strongly support the idea that commercials are persuading people to buy things they don't want.Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Submitted by Poookiiee on
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coherence cohesion
Make sure to clearly structure your essay with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices to link ideas across sentences and paragraphs. This can help the reader to follow your argument more easily.
coherence cohesion
Develop your main points fully by expanding on your ideas and providing deeper analysis.
task achievement
Ensure that the introduction sets up the topic and your thesis statement clearly, while the conclusion should summarize the main points and restate your opinion.
task achievement
Elaborate on examples by explaining how they support your argument. In this essay, the example of the celebrity influencer could have been expanded upon to show a clearer connection to the effectiveness of advertising.
task achievement
Always maintain a formal tone and avoid using informal language or colloquialisms in academic writing.
task achievement
Address both views of the argument fully and impartially before providing your own opinion to ensure a complete response to the task.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.
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