In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

It is regularly argued that
nowaday
Correct your spelling
nowadays
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an
Correct article usage
the
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average level of life expectancy is more than
previous
Change preposition
in previous
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years.
Thus
, some people guess that elderly citizens
give
Verb problem
have
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a large amount of issues in modern society.
Although
, at the same time some humans believe that it has more advantages than disadvantages.
This
essay will discuss both points of view.
Number
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A number
The number
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of scientists have shown that in recent years there have been significant changes in the age sector of our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. Referring to some potential negative outcomes of that tendency, some evidence indicates that many young specialists do not have opportunities to get a good job
due to
the fact that
elderly
Correct article usage
the elderly
show examples
generation takes all of the high-paying and respectable jobs. For a primary example, when I was extremely passionate about getting a job in
the a
Choose an article
the
a
show examples
giant hospital to work as an epidemiologist, but there was a big issue related to
this
position that was filled by a really old woman who was 74 years
.
Correct word choice
old.
show examples
Thus
nobody
deny
Change the verb form
denies
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that it is exceedingly difficult to get rid of
this
entirely.
However
, some opponents who state that there are more benefits if society has more old humans may deem the previous viewpoint questionable. The first advantage is that the elderly generation has an excellent life and job experience, which they can bring and give to the new one. The second positive is that our grandparents keep and display the traditional culture of every nation. That helps to provide human values
such
as being thankful and taking care of children and old people.
Hence
, as a rule,
counties
Correct your spelling
countries
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with a
big
Correct word choice
large
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population of elderly persons have a calm environment without
arguings
Replace the word
arguments
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.
Nevertheless
, it is necessary to take into account all the details of each individual case. From my point of view, the latter opinion is definitely more persuasive, as it follows from my own experience, for I am a volunteer who works with all generations.
Submitted by balnur_amantay on

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task response
Ensure that your essay maintains a clear position throughout the response. While you have provided a basic introduction and conclusion, the body paragraphs should consistently support your stated viewpoint with clear and comprehensive ideas.
coherence and cohesion
It's important that your essay features a logical structure. While your essay has a recognizable structure, including paragraphs, work on making sure that the ideas flow smoothly from one to the next. Use a wider range of cohesive devices to strengthen the connections between ideas and paragraphs.
task response
To enhance task achievement, your response should be expanded with more developed and specific examples. It is crucial to demonstrate your point using detailed illustrations directly linked to your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • ageing population
  • benefits
  • disadvantages
  • advantages
  • experience
  • knowledge
  • contribution
  • economy
  • society
  • healthcare
  • youth employment
  • community
  • intergenerational support
  • volunteerism
  • mentorship
  • increased demand
  • pension costs
  • social welfare systems
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • intergenerational conflict
  • technological adaptability
  • dependency
  • effective
  • skill development
  • employment opportunities
  • intergenerational solidarity
  • communication
  • lifelong learning
  • technological literacy
  • age-friendly
  • social policies
  • infrastructure
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