When a country develops its technology, the traditional skills and ways of life die out. It is pointless to try and keep them alive. Do you agree or disagree?

The traditional skills and ways of life will
be disappear
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disappear
show examples
when a country builds their
technology
. It is useless to try and keep them alive. Personally,
i
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I
show examples
totally agree that traditional
skill
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skills
show examples
and ways of life will
extinct
Add a missing verb
be extinct
show examples
. Nowadays,
technology
become more famous and potential since the pandemic came to the world. Everyone has to stay at home making
people
should think about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other
way
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ways
show examples
to meet
people
by
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apply
show examples
online or maybe
serving
Wrong verb form
serve
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
food by machine without
people
works
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
within it. One of the
kind
Change to a plural noun
kinds
show examples
of
technology
is Artificial Intelligence. It makes
us
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
easy to meet real
people
online and makes
us
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
convenient to summarize something from either video or book. Since
then
, it
changes
Wrong verb form
has changed
show examples
the way of
people
thoughts.
Therefore
, so many drawbacks
happened
Wrong verb form
happen
show examples
when
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
comes to
the
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apply
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society.
For instance
, being lazy is the most cruel
things
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thing
show examples
because you
use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online
meeting
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meetings
show examples
to meet without moving from one place to
others
Correct quantifier usage
another
show examples
and
use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Artificial Intelligence to work without
use
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using
show examples
your ability to work.
Consequently
, it will make
impact
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an impact
show examples
to
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on
show examples
health and the way
of
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apply
show examples
people's
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people
show examples
thinking
Replace the word
think
show examples
like creative thinking.
Additionally
, we will lose
work's
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work
show examples
skills and
feeling
Replace the word
feelings
show examples
to understand. Just imagine, there will be a lot of
people
will
Correct pronoun usage
who will
show examples
use
robot
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robots
show examples
to
serving
Wrong verb form
serve
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
food in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
restaurant
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restaurants
show examples
or coffee
shop
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shops
show examples
. If the machine is broken, it takes time to repair it and the customer will be angry
due to
the bad serving.
Furthermore
, high costs will be another issue. In conclusion, there are many things
will
Correct pronoun usage
that will
show examples
be disappear
Change the verb form
disappear
show examples
when the country
use
Correct subject-verb agreement
uses
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
as a main
things
Correct the article-noun agreement
thing
show examples
in daily
uses
Fix the agreement mistake
use
show examples
.
Submitted by Dedeways244 on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to have a clear structure to your essay with an introductory paragraph that sets out the question, followed by body paragraphs that each tackle a single point, and a concluding paragraph that summarises your views.
coherence cohesion
Include a range of linking words and phrases to help connect your ideas and make your reasoning easy to follow.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points. Use these to demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the question by clearly stating whether you agree or disagree and providing arguments to support this position.
coherence cohesion
Work on grammar and sentence structure to avoid repetitive sentence beginnings and to improve the overall flow of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Technological advancement
  • Efficiency
  • Global connectivity
  • Cultural identity
  • Diversity
  • Innovation
  • Coexist
  • Sustainable
  • Eco-friendly
  • Energy-intensive
  • Practical skills
  • Self-sufficiency
  • Homogenize
  • Preservation
  • Global diversity
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