Some parents think that advertisements are misleading for children, while advertisers claim that they provide knowledge. Give your opinion.

Advertisements have become a major concern
recent
Change preposition
in recent
show examples
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
.Parents
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
that
children
.
This
essay will discuss
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
can be
children
.And why they can information.On the one
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
it is
though
Correct your spelling
through
show examples
advertisement
.Today young
children
are more likely to
beleive
Correct your spelling
believe
easily.They
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
see and hear compared
Change preposition
to other
show examples
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
tv
Correct your spelling
TV
show examples
fast food
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
especially
children
Change preposition
for children
show examples
.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
the expensive fast food leads to child obesity.
Therefore
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
which help
advertise much
Verb problem
raise a lot of
show examples
money
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
young.
The
Change preposition
On the
show examples
other hand advert may
educational
Add a missing verb
be educational
show examples
for
children
.Some
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
give knowledge and information
children
Change preposition
to children
show examples
about
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
life.
Thus
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
can be informative and educational for
children
.In
Correct your spelling
conclusion
conlusion
Add a comma
conlusion,
show examples
children
are
surround
Wrong verb form
surrounded
show examples
daily
Change preposition
by daily
show examples
life.In my opinion
which
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
promote
Correct subject-verb agreement
promotes
show examples
unhealthy foods.
However
some
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
hygiene and
healthy
Replace the word
health
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
issue
Correct your spelling
tissue
show examples
Submitted by nazirovmuhammad71 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear structure with an introduction that introduces the topic, a few body paragraphs that explore your main points, and a conclusion that summarizes your argument. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea and be connected with transition words.
task achievement
To address the task fully, make sure you answer the question directly and expand on your ideas with reasons and specific examples. Acknowledge the counterargument but also clearly state and support your own opinion throughout the essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: