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Band 6.5

People nowadays tend to have children at an older age. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #children #age
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Some people believe that it is better to have
children
 later in life because it allows them to better provide, to pass on experience, and
also
 to develop more comprehensively and strive to understand younger generations. Opponents of late childbirth believe that it is harmful to the health of the parent and child. By comparing all possible arguments it is possible to come to a conclusion about who is closer to the truth.
Firstly
, having
children
 at an older age can be dangerous for the baby's health, because those born to parents over 40 have a higher risk of genetic conditions like Down syndrome.
Children
 may face health issues related to an increased risk of premature birth, fetal growth restriction, and fetal macrosomia which means high birth weight.
Secondly
, formerly geriatric
pregnancy
 is
also
 considered a higher risk for patients. These are consequences
such
 as multiple pregnancies and emergency cesarean section.
On the other hand
, becoming a parent at a later age allows people to ensure a better financial situation for their
children
. During
pregnancy
, people can afford better medical care and nutrition, and
while
 raising
children
, they can provide them with better education and leisure.
In addition
, older parents are able to pass on their accumulated knowledge to their
children
 and give them better advice. In turn, the person themself will be able to adopt the thoughts of the younger generation and learn to look at the world more broadly.
Thus
, the pros of late
pregnancy
 outweigh the cons, since a healthy 38-year-old could have an easier
pregnancy
 than a 20-year-old
due to
 the availability of funds for good medical care. They will
also
 be able to give more to the child in material and moral terms.
Submitted by julykryuchkova on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure you have a clear introduction and conclusion that signal the beginning and end of your argument. Your conclusion could more explicitly reflect the extent to which the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, making your position clearer.
Coherence & Cohesion
Develop logical sequencing of ideas. Use a range of cohesive devices and topic sentences to guide the reader through your argument, ensuring that each body paragraph begins with a clear main point that is then elaborated with evidence or examples.
Task Achievement
Ensure you address the task fully by consistently discussing both the advantages and disadvantages throughout your essay. The prompt asks for an evaluation of whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, so make sure your conclusion clearly states your position based on the body of your work.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to support your points, which can strengthen your arguments. Evidence from credible sources or hypothetical scenarios that illustrate the points being made can add depth to your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Trend
  • Delaying parenthood
  • Biological clock
  • Financial stability
  • Emotional maturity
  • Health risks
  • Opportunity cost
  • Weighing the pros and cons
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