Everyone should stay in school until the age of eighteen , considering the significance of primary & secondary level education in a learner's life. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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Everyone has the right to receive an
education
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. As we know primary
school
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plays an important role for
children
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.
Children
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must get enough
education
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however
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it can be a foundation for lifelong learning, intellectual growth, and development
skills
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. I totally agree that everyone should stay in
school
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until the age of eighteen as they will get many benefits from
school
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Firstly
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, primary and secondary
school
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have the role important because the
children
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get their basic
education
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.
Children
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spend these years learning various subjects and many
skills
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.
Such
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as social
skills
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, critical thinking
skills
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, teamwork
skills
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and many more. These
skills
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can help their present and future.
For example
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,
children
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learn how to socialize with their friends at
school
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.
Also
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,
children
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critical thinking
skills
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and teamwork
skills
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through the assignments or projects at
school
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.
Children
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who attend formal
education
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can sharpen various
skills
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.
Moreover
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, these
skills
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are valuable in various aspects of life and work. It is important
to
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for to
show examples
children
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stay in until the age of eighteen.
Moreover
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, people who get higher
education
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will get better opportunities in their jobs and careers,
due to
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several companies
also
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screening the employee's educational background before being recruited.
Secondly
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,
children
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who did not attend secondary
school
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and primary
school
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may get lack in various subjects and
also
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they may miss out on many basic
skills
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which can be affected
to
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apply
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their various aspects of life.
Also
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, they may face limited
various
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variety
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of job and career opportunities these situations will have an impact on their finances
as a result
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the number of poverty increases.
To conclude
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, every child should attend formal
school
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until eighteen, which can be highly beneficial for their personal, social, and economic development.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure there is a clear logical structure throughout the essay. It's important to have an introductory sentence that clearly states your opinion followed by cohesive paragraphs that each address a singular, coherent idea.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion is present but could be strengthened by summarizing the main points more explicitly and restating your opinion with a stronger, more conclusive statement.
coherence cohesion
Develop each main point with clear specific examples or explanations. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea that is well supported with relevant details and examples.
task achievement
Make sure your response completely addresses all parts of the task. Clearly articulate your extent of agreement or disagreement with the statement, providing detailed explanations.
task achievement
Use a wider range of vocabulary and grammatical structures to express ideas more precisely and fluently. Avoid repetition of simple words and phrases; instead, demonstrate your language ability with varied language.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to illustrate your points. This can be real-world examples, statistics, studies, or personal anecdotes that are relevant to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Compulsory education
  • Foundational knowledge
  • Career prospects
  • Economic mobility
  • Lifelong learner
  • Vocational training
  • Apprenticeships
  • Academic achievements
  • Global economy
  • Personal autonomy
  • Educational equity
  • Overqualification
  • Job market saturation
  • Inequality
  • Specialization
  • Skill development
  • Youth unemployment
  • Innovative pedagogy
  • Social integration
  • Critical thinking skills
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