Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#world #adults #home #children #study #technology #development

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In the present day, the development of technology especially in the information and communication fields is undeniable. Everyone

from

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different ages and statuses including children already owns a smartphone or other communication

devices

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device

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because it is likely to be less expensive nowadays. The COVID-19 pandemic that happened

at the end

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of 2019

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made a significant culture in society

such

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as work from anywhere and online classes for students. Some

people

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believe that

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development has a negative impact as it could decrease real-life interaction and increase smartphone addiction. But in my opinion,

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phenomenon has a bigger positive impact. In

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essay, I will elaborate on the issue and

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depict my point of view. First of all, the main advantage of the online culture

are

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the effectiveness of time. With work-from-home and online classes for students,

people

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do not need to commute daily and can use their time for other activities

such

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as exercising or reading to maintain their health.

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, with fewer

people

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needing to commute, fewer vehicles will swarm across the city, and it leads to a decrease in air pollution and

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increase in the air quality in the city.

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, working from home can improve

people

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not only physically, but

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mentally because they can have more spare time to spend with themselves and

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with family and friends. In conclusion,

although

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this

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online culture

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has disadvantages

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as lowering

people

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's skills to socialize and have face-to-face interaction, the benefits outweigh the disadvantages if we can balance online and offline interaction, and be responsible with our tasks and work.

Submitted by rlsk.2899 on Mon Feb 05 2024

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Coherence & Cohesion

To improve your logical structure, consider adding clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph and ensure that each sentence that follows is directly related to the topic sentence.

Coherence & Cohesion

Introduction and conclusion were present but can be enhanced by providing a more detailed thesis statement and a clearer summary of main points in the conclusion.

Coherence & Cohesion

While you supported your main points, to strengthen your argument, include a greater variety of sentence structures and more sophisticated linking words.

Task Achievement

To achieve a complete response, expand your discussion with a more in-depth analysis of the impact of working from home and studying online.

Task Achievement

You presented clear ideas but ensure that each idea is fully developed with comprehensive explanations and is not just stated.

Task Achievement

Include more relevant and specific examples to illustrate your main points. Personal examples from your own experience or knowledge will provide a stronger case.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

remote work
e-learning
accessibility
inclusive
productivity
personalized learning
disciplined routine
interpersonal skills
cybersecurity
sustainability
work-life balance
physical disabilities

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Fully explain your ideas

Young people who commit serious crimes such as robbery or violent attacks should be punished in the same way as aduls who commit the same crimes. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A lot of people who wanted to become professional athletes gave up this idea because of the fear of failure and parents' pressure. Do you think that parents should support their children who want to do a career in sports?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

the plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevolpment next year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevalnt.