The graph below shows the different home activities among young children in four different countries.

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The bar chart displays home activities

such

Linking Words

computer

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games

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, reading, board

games

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, and watching

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in Malaysia, China, Nigeria, and Sudan

Overall

Linking Words

, the highest data in each

country

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computer

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games

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, followed

for

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watching

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Correct your spelling

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with the same data, and the activity with less interaction is reading. Nigeria, is the

country

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with a big portion of participation in

computer

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games

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, being reading the activity with less data. Malasya and Sudan had a similar analysis in their bars

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apply

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since video

games

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and

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had the same portions of 50 and 30.

Instead

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, Sudan and

nigeria

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Nigeria

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had a small portion of 10 in the category of reading, and Malsya and China got 20 and 15.

Besides

Linking Words

, the feature of watching

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is a category in second place after

computer

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games

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, since each

country

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had the same 30

portion

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portions

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of children.

Nonetheless

Linking Words

, China was the

country

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with the lowest participation in

computer

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games

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, it got a percentage of 40 in comparison with the other countries.

jennitobon16Mon Feb 05 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words computer, games, tv, country with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

163 words

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The graph below shows the different home activities among young children in four different countries.

Some people argue that immigrants should adopt the local culture when immigrating to a new country. An alternative view is that they can adapt to a new environment by establishing a minority community. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that governments should spend money for faster public transportation, others think that there are other important priorities (e.g. cost, environment). Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the most important thing about being rich is it gives a person the opportunity to help other people. Do you agree or disagree?

In the future, nobody will buy products newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement