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Writing Samples
Band 4

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries.
#tables #information #sales #coffee #bananas #five #european #countries
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The tables below tell the information about 1999 and 2004
sales
Use synonyms
 of Fairtrade-labeled
coffee
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 and
bananas
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 in five different
countries
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. There are 2 different categories which are
coffee
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 and
bananas
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.
This
Linking Words
 Fairtrade was held in the 5 following
countries
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, which are; UK,
Switzerland
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, Denmark, Belgium, and
Sweden
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. From the tables, the
overall
Linking Words
 ratio of
coffee
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 between the UK and the rest of the
countries
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 has a significant gap.
Linking Words
Similarly
Add a comma
Similarly,
show examples
 with
bananas
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, the
sales
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 made in 1999 and 2004 have a big steep rise between the other
countries
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. The
overall
Linking Words
 data was increasing between the two years, except for the number of
bananas
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 sold in
Sweden
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 and
Denmarks
Fix the agreement mistake
Denmark
show examples
.
The fairtrade
Correct article usage
Fairtrade
show examples
labeled
Change the spelling
labelled
show examples
coffee
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 had the lowest
sales
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 in
Sweden
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for
Change preposition
at
show examples
 0.8 million
euros
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 and the highest value in
Switzerland
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for
Change preposition
at
show examples
 3
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
euros
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. Meanwhile, in 2004, most
sales
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 of
coffee
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was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 in the UK at 20
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
euros
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 and the lowest
sales
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 at 1
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
euros
Use synonyms
 in
Sweden
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. For the banana fairtrade, the highest
sales
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 made in 1999
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 in
Switzerland
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 at 15
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
euros
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 and the lowest
sales
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was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 at 0.6
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
euros
Use synonyms
 in Belgium.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the highest amount of
bananas
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 sold was at 47
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millions euro
Fix the agreement mistake
million euros
show examples
 in
Switzerland
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 and less sold at 0.9 million
euros
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 in Denmark for the year 2004.
Submitted by lydiaia on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 73%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, coffee, bananas, countries, switzerland, sweden, euros, millions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "tables" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fairtrade sales
  • significant growth
  • trends and patterns
  • market expansion
  • sustainable consumption
  • ethical products
  • consumer awareness
  • economic impact
  • percentage increase
  • market share
  • profit margins
  • trade initiatives
  • consumer behavior
  • retail figures
  • economic indicators
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