IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Global warming is one of the most serious issues that the world is facing today. What are the causes of global warming what measures can government and individuals take to tackle the issue?

#world #measures #government #individuals
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Nowadays, the world is facing several problems which occur because of humans. One of the important
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
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 is global warming. There are a lot of reasons for
this
 but steps can be taken to tackle
this
problem
. In my opinion, the main reasons for
this
problem
 are humans want to enjoy
with
Change preposition
apply
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their life and demand a number of valuable things from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nature and do not protect the environment. At
first,
people want to live in industrial cities which have all
Correct article usage
the convenience
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convenience
Fix the agreement mistake
conveniences
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. They construct a lot of
factories
 and plants which can manufacture a variety of useful items for daily life. At the same
time
Add a comma
time,
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 individuals do not protect
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nature. The
factories
what
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 people use produce harmful gasses and waste. It can cause
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
pollution. It is very dangerous to live in polluted cities. It has many negative aspects for humans’ health and
area’s
Correct article usage
the area’s
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 flora and fauna.
However
, it has solutions
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
problem
.
Firstly
, the government have to change the situation of the
factories
. They have to create eco-friendly
factories
instead
 of traditional plants. It helps to decrease the garbage.
Secondly
,
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 and all
people
Correct article usage
the people
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 in one area have to stop cutting trees.
Instead
 of
this
Add a comma
this,
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 they should create green parks in large
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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 of the city. And hunters must
to
Change the verb form
apply
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stop killing all creatures in wildlife.
As a result
 of
these
Add a comma
these,
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 our nature might be pure and clean. In conclusion, our planet will continue to face
range
Add an article
a range
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 of environmental problems unless
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and all individuals follow the scientists’ advice.
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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task achievement
Ensure that you develop your main points with clear specific examples to support them. Providing real-world examples or data can strengthen the argument and make your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Structure your essay with clear and logical transitions between paragraphs. Use cohesive devices effectively to link ideas and paragraphs together.
coherence cohesion
Expand on your conclusion to encapsulate the full scope of the argument presented and reiterate the importance of the measures suggested.
task achievement
Focus on developing a stronger thesis statement in the introduction that outlines the causes and solutions you will discuss.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • burning of fossil fuels
  • greenhouse gases
  • trap heat
  • atmosphere
  • deforestation
  • carbon dioxide
  • greenhouse effect
  • industrial activities
  • agricultural practices
  • carbon emissions
  • renewable energy
  • environmental regulations
  • energy efficiency
  • carbon footprint
  • lifestyle changes
  • public transportation
  • recycling
  • conserving energy
  • LED bulbs
  • plant-based diet
  • raising awareness
  • sustainable practices
  • international cooperation
  • Paris Agreement
  • mitigate
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