Many people are opting for several careers as compared to a single career to earn more money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, a group of
people
are inclined toward
to Change preposition
apply
work
in various professions, out of necessity or by their own will. In the
other words, when Correct article usage
apply
people
choose to entertain in another jobs
, there would be financial circumstancesReplace the adjective
another job
other jobs
,
or a mental issue.
Working hard is not always for enhancing our bank accounts, sometimes Remove the comma
apply
people
have no other choices due to
their financial problems. Especially, in undeveloped countries it looks hard for people
to meet all of their needs just with one particular job. Therefore
, they tend to work
in another one. For instance
, some adults in my country are suffering from lack
of budget, and Correct article usage
a lack
while
they are an
Correct article usage
apply
employee
in a company and have Fix the agreement mistake
employees
monthly
salary, they should Add an article
a monthly
work
in jobs like online taxi driving after they work
hours to earn more money
. As a result
, in this
case
working in another career is mandatory.
Add a comma
case,
In contrast
, someone who have
a materialistic character Change the verb form
has
work
unstoptable
to make a fortune. Actually, these kinds of Correct your spelling
unstoppable
people
may have severe psychological issues that compel them to work
harder for more money
and luxury life style
. They believe, Correct your spelling
lifestyle
if
they Correct word choice
that if
wanted
to spend Wrong verb form
want
money
for any reason, firstly
they have to earn more. For more explanation, my cousin's husband is a workaholic man who always talk
about Change the verb form
talks
money
and finance. He does not care about spending time with his wife and children,
but cares a lot Remove the comma
apply
for
his Change preposition
about
bank's
account status.
In conclusion, I think there are various factors that can persuade someone to Change noun form
bank
work
in different careers. This
demand can originate from a mandatory situation and financial issue, or in
the other hand, it would be a mental health.Change preposition
on
Submitted by afrough on
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Introduction
Ensure you have a clear thesis statement in the introduction that addresses the essay prompt directly. This statement should guide the overall direction of your essay.
Coherence
Structure your main paragraphs around clear topic sentences that relate back to the thesis. Each paragraph should explore a single main idea.
Cohesion
Use a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas and arguments smoothly. Avoid repetition by using synonyms and paraphrasing where appropriate.
Task Response
Develop your ideas fully with more detailed explanations and specific examples that directly support your arguments. Ensure examples are directly related to the topic.
Conclusion
Include a conclusion that summarizes your key points and restates your position in a clear and direct manner. Avoid introducing new ideas or evidence in the conclusion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.