IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Cashless transaction order of the day most of the time people prefer using plastic cash do you think this is trend will be useful for the society.

#cashless #transaction #time #people #plastic #cash #trend #society
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Nowadays, with the development of technology, people tend to use cards and plastic
cash
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 for their transactions and using
paper
Use synonyms
money
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 is deprecated. In my point of view, it is a positive change in society.
This
Linking Words
 approach prevents the spreading of epidemic diseases caused by touching
paper
Use synonyms
money
Use synonyms
, makes the tracking of the spent
money
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 easier and helps society through taxation. Touching
paper
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 and coin
money
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 may cause infections. Before plastic
money
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 was invented, people used coins and
paper
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cash
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 for their purchases. With each purchase, the
money
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 was moved between so many hands and each individual touching it may have pollution or dirt on his or her hand. So, after each purchase, the
money
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 became more and more polluted.
For instance
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, consider buying a good from a supermarket with
cash
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. The cashier takes the
money
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 from another customer and pays back your change. If that other customer has the flu, there is a chance for you to catch the sickness as well.
Therefore
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, the
money
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 going around has negative effects on the association's health. When you buy your necessities with a card, you can keep track of your income more easily. Today, banks have provided many facilities for you to check your
money
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transaction
Fix the agreement mistake
transactions
show examples
, like sending an SMS of your bank account status or providing mobile applications to check your account situation and the history of your transactions.
Hence
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, you can trace your payments and make sure you did not make any mistakes in them by using plastic
cash
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.
Additionally
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, buying with cards gives an opportunity to governments to collect taxes more easily. They can track each person's wealth and account
transaction
Fix the agreement mistake
transactions
show examples
. So, the calculation of the amount of tax for each individual will be more
precisely
Change the word
precise
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.
Therefore
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, there will be more fairness in tax collection.
Overall
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, I believe that
Correct article usage
the deprication
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deprication
Correct your spelling
depreciation
deprivation
 of
paper
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money
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 is a positive change in nations. It has benefits like preventing epidemic diseases, tracking your payments and better tax calculation. It is recommended for everyone to stop using
paper
Use synonyms
cash
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 and always consider cards for paying.
Submitted by mohamad.sanaye462 on

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure that your essay fully addresses all parts of the prompt. Expand with additional examples and explanations to substantiate the points made, demonstrating a broader range of understanding.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, work on creating stronger links between paragraphs, perhaps through more effective use of transition words or phrases. Ensure each paragraph flows seamlessly into the next for a more cohesive argument.
coherence and cohesion
To bolster supported main points, include more specific examples and relevant details to enhance the persuasiveness of your arguments. Use real-life scenarios, statistics, or findings to make your points more concrete.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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