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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born. What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?

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Some individuals spend the great majority part of their
lives
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 at their birthplaces. There are several assumptions for their choice which are accompanied by both benefits and downsides. In
this
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 essay, I will look at the reasons for the debated topic before turning to positive and negative aspects. Some folks have tended to live their whole
lives
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 in the
place
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 they were born. The first point to consider is living among their relatives
while
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 surrounded by a familiar environment brings them nothing but de-stress
lives
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. Indeed, these people assume themselves as a part of their society,
hence
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, if they need any help, they can rely on others.
In addition
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, most of them have used to live in that particular area.
Although
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 they may travel to other places as a tourist, their sense of stability in their familiar places is undeniable which persuades them to get back to their birth location. Living in the
place
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 where we are born has some benefits
such
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 as the support of relatives, a stable and predictable life, and
inhibit
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apply
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the stress of migration. In terms of disadvantages, losing opportunities for a better life or career is considerable.
Moreover
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, relocating is sometimes provided with unexpected chances which is only available for risk-takers. In fact, if we had decided to get out of our shells and move to a new
place
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 to live, we might have been surprised by unpredictable opportunities. In conclusion, there are some reasons for some people
Fix the infinitive
to
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stick to their living
place
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 their whole
lives
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, which are accompanied by positive and negative aspects, and I believe the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.

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task achievement
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea that is developed throughout, with specific and detailed examples that support the main topic.
coherence cohesion
Work on creating clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
Make sure to restate the key points in your conclusion to effectively summarize your essay and give a balanced view on the topic.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to better connect ideas and paragraphs together.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Familiarity
  • Comfort
  • Social ties
  • Family ties
  • Belonging
  • Resources
  • Opportunities
  • Fear
  • Unknown
  • Financial constraints
  • Cultural attachment
  • Language barriers
  • Limited education
  • Skills
What to do next:
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