10/2 In some countries today, people are having their first child when they are older. What are the reasons for this? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#countries #people #first #child #development

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Nowadays, the age of having the first kid for each family has increased,

Correct word choice

and more

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people are less willing to have kids

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their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

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younger ages. Personally, I believe there are some factors

influence

Correct pronoun usage

that influence

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their opinions, the following content will outline

factors

Correct article usage

the factors

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and benefits of

this

Linking Words

trend.

Firstly

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, because of economic

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

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such

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financial

Correct article usage

the financial

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crisis, the younger generation is unable to afford childcare.

For example

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, young workers need to spend more

time

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to work

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working

show examples

, in order to earn the money to buy their own houses, pay their monthly bills and save money for future demand.

As a result

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, without enough free

time

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and financial ability, families' willingness

of having

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to have

show examples

children

Use synonyms

would dramatically decrease. The mature attitude of having an intact family and sufficient financial support

are

Change the verb form

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the most

benefits

Replace the word

beneficial

show examples

this

Linking Words

trend. As growing older, young generations

would

Verb problem

apply

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realise the difficulty of having a child,

therefore

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, they

would

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will

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be well-prepared for the upcoming challenges.

Furthermore

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, after several years in work fields, most young workers have been promoted or have

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apply

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higher salaries, which means their socio-economic background can financially support them to raise their

children

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Hence

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, it becomes a proper

time

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for them to give birth

their

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to their

show examples

babies. In conclusion, insufficient family income and economic pressure are the most crucial elements to influence people to have

children

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. As young people have obtained more social experience and money, it turns into the most suitable

time

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for having

the

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their

show examples

first kid. I firmly believe

this

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is a positive trend for both parents and

children

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Submitted by chaoweikevin on Fri Feb 09 2024

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Task Achievement

To enhance task achievement, ensure that you address all parts of the prompt fully. While you mentioned the reasons for older parenthood, you should also clearly discuss specific advantages and disadvantages. Incorporate relevant and specific examples to strengthen your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion

Develop a more logical structure by organizing your main points clearly. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea and conclude with a brief summary of the main points discussed.

Coherence and Cohesion

Improve your coherence by connecting ideas and paragraphs smoother with the help of better transitions and cohesive devices. Each paragraph must lead naturally into the next.

Task Achievement

Support your main points with more relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Providing concrete examples helps to convey your ideas more effectively and makes your essay more persuasive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

252 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Shift
Trend
Societal norms
Education and career
Financial stability
Reproductive technologies
Delayed marriages
Parenting responsibilities
Life expectancy
Family planning

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10/2 In some countries today, people are having their first child when they are older. What are the reasons for this? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Fully explain your ideas

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You recently noticed a local restaurant that was offering a part-time job. Write a letter to the restaurant's manager. In your letter, -explain that you would like to apply for the job -give some details of any relevant experience that you have -specify the days and times that would suit you

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.