IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some belive that installing CCTVs in high crime areas will help to reduce crime. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

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Many argue that installing
CCTVs
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 can help decrease offences in high-crime areas. Installing
security
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cameras
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 has many benefits because it can reduce the time to catch criminals.
Whereas
Linking Words
, it could infringe
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people’s
Change preposition
on people’s
show examples
 privacy.
CCTVs
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 have an advantage, which is that they can minimize the time to catch offenders. These days, many countries
enlarge
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have enlarged
show examples
 CCTV numbers. Through
security
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cameras
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, police can specify the offender’s features or locations. In
this
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 situation, the police can save their human resources and budget.
For example
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, Korea is one of the countries where there are many
CCTVs
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. Recently, there has been no serial killer because of
security
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cameras
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. The police can catch perpetrators before they commit other crimes through
CCTVs
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.
However
Linking Words
, it can invade
people’s
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 privacy. As almost all shops have
CCTVs
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, many citizens are recorded by
security
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cameras
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. Under
this
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 circumstance, the biggest problem is recording
people’s
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 every move without consent.
For
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 reason, people can be exposed to other crimes,
such
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 as hacking the password.
For instance
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, in Korea, a bank employee has hacked a customer’s bank password through CCTV. The employee withdrew tens of millions of won from the customer’s bank account. In conclusion, many people think that installing
cameras
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 that record everything for safety and
security
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 positively reduces crime in cities with high crime rates.
However
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, the
cameras
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 have a negative effect on
people’s
Use synonyms
 privacy.

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structure
Ensure your essay includes a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The introduction should introduce the topic and the main points that will be discussed. The conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points and restate your position.
content
Develop your main points more thoroughly by delving deeper into how and why CCTVs can prevent crime or infringe on privacy. Include more detailed examples, data, or case studies to support your arguments.
coherence
Improve the logical flow between your ideas by using a wider range of linking words and phrases. This will help create a smoother reading experience and better coherence between sentences and paragraphs.
task response
Address the task more completely by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of CCTV installation in high-crime areas in a balanced manner. Make sure to also clearly state your overall position or opinion on the issue.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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