IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of ths outweigh the disadvantages ?

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For a healthy life, diet plays a significant role in someone's life. It is generally believed that, in many countries, citizens follow a pure vegetarian diet and
this
Linking Words
 trend is
going
Verb problem
becoming
show examples
 popular among them. It has
an
Correct article usage
apply
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ample
of
Change preposition
apply
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benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
.
This
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 essay will present some points, regarding
to
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 notion.
To begin
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 with,
According to
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 ancient culture,
at
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in
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 many
places
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places,
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 green vegetations are only considered
as
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apply
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an edible thing for both animals and humans. Eating
vegetables
Use synonyms
 has many benefits, like healthy metabolism, purification of blood, improvement in reflexes and many more.
Moreover
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, after consuming
vegeterian
Correct your spelling
vegetarian
food
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, our body gets all
necessary
Correct article usage
the necessary
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 components which are essential. To prove it, as per the latest survey, it is resulted that the person who
consume
Change the verb form
consumes
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 more green vegetation are likely to have healthy organs for a long time as compared to those who prefer junk
food
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. Even in many institutions, many children are being taught the advantages of
vegetables
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.
Furthermore
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, there are many different types of green
vegetables
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 which
has
Change the verb form
have
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 their own
significance
Replace the word
significant
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 benefits. It is
also
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 known that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 green
vegetables
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provides
Change the verb form
provide
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 the same energy as we get
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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from Non-veg
food
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. The common
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefit
 which all the green
food
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provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
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 is good eyesight.
Eventhough
Correct your spelling
Even though
 some foods are bitter in taste,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
after making
it
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them
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 in a proper way, the taste can be changed.
For instance
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, Green Coriander is mostly known for providing a better sight,
therfore
Correct your spelling
therefore
 it is used as a garnishing in every
food
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.
To conclude
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, There is no doubt that these green foods provide a lot more
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
.
However
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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consumption
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 been
also
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 increased among people
from
Change preposition
in
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past
Correct article usage
the past
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 few decades. Many Provinces have
also
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 decided to go
complete
Change the word
completely
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 green and for
further
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 promotion, many
camp
Change to a plural noun
camps
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 have been organized to make
understand
Correct pronoun usage
us understand
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 the value of
green-
Correct your spelling
green food
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food
Use synonyms
 to the people.

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task achievement
Ensure a more structured introduction that clearly states whether you believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, setting a clear stance for your argument.
task achievement
Enhance the essay by incorporating a paragraph that discusses potential disadvantages to create a more balanced argument, directly addressing the essay question.
coherence and cohesion
Improve essay clarity by using paragraphing effectively to separate your main points. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence that indicates what the paragraph will discuss.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs, improving the flow of your essay. Examples include 'Furthermore', 'However', 'In addition', etc.
general advice
Revise your essay for spelling and grammar errors, ensuring correct use of vocabulary and verb tenses. This will enhance the overall clarity and presentation of your essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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