A lot of people have become dependent on technology as it plays a big role in our daily lives. Do you agree that living in computer age has more advantages than disadvantages? Describe the positive and negative impacts of technology on our lives and give your opinion.

Nowadays,
Technology
has a great effect on our lives.
This
essay will examine the advantages and
disadvantages
of
technology
and provide a logical conclusion. The main advantages of
technology
are getting
information
and knowledge about anything easily and saving
time
as well as
effort.
Firstly
, by using the internet on the computer, it is extremely easy to search for any
information
rather than using dictionaries or searching for something using scientific books.
For instance
, I usually search for some definitions of hydrology using the internet
instead
of scientific books. I see that it is worth it and gives enough
information
.
Secondly
, Working and doing tasks on the computer saves so much effort,
time
and money.
For example
, I always use some engineering
softwares
Correct your spelling
software
like AutoCAD to finish my complicated tasks. No need to buy pencils or pens to draw and spend more
time
to finish
Change the verb form
finishing
show examples
tasks.
In contrast
,
Technology
has some major
disadvantages
like wasting
time
on
computer
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
show examples
and affecting our physical bodies. Using computers in playing video games and watching restricted videos for a long period of
time
may result in wasting a lot of
time
,
Moreover
, it affects our physical activities as we usually use computers when we are at rest.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
I think proper management and correct usage of
technology
can eliminate these
disadvantages
.
To Conclude
,
Although
Technology
has certain
disadvantages
like wasting
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
time
and affecting our physical activities, it has extremely positive impacts like saving a lot of
time
and getting
information
easily. I believe that these benefits of tourism outweigh its drawbacks.
Submitted by mohamedicdl175 on

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task achievement
Ensure your essay directly addresses the prompt. While you mentioned the advantages and disadvantages of technology, you could further expand on how these points specifically relate to the statement about living in a computer age having more advantages than disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Incorporate a wider range of cohesive devices (transitions, pronouns) to create smoother connections between your ideas and paragraphs. This strengthens the overall cohesiveness of your essay.
task achievement
Enhance your task response by providing more nuanced examples and analyses. This includes exploring the implications of your examples and possibly comparing them to counter-arguments or alternative perspectives.
coherence cohesion
Further support your main points by linking them back to the question prompt more explicitly. This could involve summarising how each advantage/disadvantage impacts societal or individual well-being in the context of the computer age.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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