IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Modern lifestyle are completely different from the way of people lived in the past. Some people think changes have been positive, while other believe they have been negative. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

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Some
people
Use synonyms
 deem that living in the past
days
Use synonyms
 was more
confortale
Correct your spelling
comfortable
 and
safier
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safer
,
whereas
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 others think that the changes
Correct pronoun usage
that occured
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occured
Correct your spelling
occurred
 in the world are positive and enhanced our lives. In
this
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 essay, both visions will be discussed and
then
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, my opinion will be developed in the following lines. It is true that in the past
Use synonyms
days
Add a comma
days,
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people
Use synonyms
 had
less
Correct quantifier usage
fewer
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global scale
Add a hyphen
global-scale
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 problems to tackle. Environmental issues and international economic crisis,
for instance
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, were themes few debated twenty years ago.
Thus
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,
people
Use synonyms
 lived their lives thinking
in
Change preposition
on
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 a local scale.
Besides
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 that, some
illness
Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses
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 like anxiety and
drepression
Correct your spelling
depression
were
Wrong verb form
are
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 faced with different
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
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 as nowadays, which does not make these problems inexistent in
early
Correct article usage
the early
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 years.
In other words
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, the lack of awareness used to be normal, not because
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things were not happening, but because we were not being well informed as today.
Nonetheless
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,
in
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apply
show examples
these
days
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 we are assailed with a bunch of information, which is making us flooded by consuming news.
As a result
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, we do not know how to process
this
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 volume of data and most time we feel lost.
On the other hand
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, if someone knows how to filter what to watch or read, he or she can
be benefited
Wrong verb form
benefit
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with
Change preposition
from
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 the fact of having
Correct article usage
an avaliable
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avaliable
Correct your spelling
available
 source to
reasearch
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research
 everything on the internet anytime.
For example
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, if a person wants to know more about a political conflict concerning some country, he or she can google it and read about historical facts and understand more
what
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about what
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 is going on nowadays.
To conclude
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, each generation
deal
Correct subject-verb agreement
deals
show examples
 with problems and facts that are related to their time. There is no better or worse. Our daily demands created the urgency of using more technology and science. And in the past
days
Use synonyms
,
however
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,
people
Use synonyms
 dealt with their issues as they could.

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Task Response
Ensure a clear and direct thesis statement is present in your introduction to immediately indicate your opinion or viewpoint on the topic. This aids in task achievement by aligning reader expectations.
Task Response
Expand on your ideas by incorporating more relevant and detailed examples to support your arguments. This deepens the essay's content and shows a more comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on creating more cohesive paragraphs by using a variety of linking words and phrases that clearly connect your ideas. This will enhance the reader's ability to follow your argumentation and improve coherence.
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