In the future, more people will chose to go on holidays in their own country and not travel abroad on holidays. Do you agree or disagree?
It is certainly undeniable that
tourism
is becoming one of the most popular and lucrative industries in the world. Many people
would like to travel
to and visit destinations
in their own country
to be more familiar with their own culture and values. Others, on the other hand
, would like to explore foreign destinations
and experience new cultures. I firmly disagree with the proposed question and believe that more and more people
will choose international destinations
for their holidays
.
It is argued that domestic tourist destinations
are attracting more travellers these days. Governments are certainly investing a considerable amount of finances on
promoting local tourist Change preposition
in
destinations
to help with the
economic growth. By targeted marketing, local Correct article usage
apply
offcials
can positively raise Correct your spelling
officials
people
's awareness of the cultural significance and values of their own country
and encourage them to spend their holidays
in the
own Change the word
their
country
. For instance
, by spending around $2 billion dollars in the last
five years, the United States managed to increase local tourism
by %25. Therefore
, it can be concluded that more people
are spending their holidays
in their own country
.
However
, there are many people
who wish to experience new cultures, visit foreign and exotic locations, and meet new people
. As a result
, they would rather spend their holidays
abroad and go to other countries. Advancements in technology and
Correct article usage
the tourism
tourism
industry have certainly made international travel
more feasible and convenient. Furthermore
, many countries such
as France, England, Thailand, and Australia heavily depend on international tourism
and naturally are investing millions of dollars in their travel
and tourism
campaigns. Therefore
, it is safe to say that many people
would love to travel
to countries to which they have never been and enjoy new experiences.
In conclusion, I would agree with the idea that more people
would choose international holidays
so that they can get new experiences, meet new people
, and understand other cultures.Submitted by hsmkashi on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
Ensure the introduction clearly presents your opinion on the topic. Your introduction set a good foreground for discussion but could benefit from a more direct statement of agreement or disagreement with the prompt.
Task Achievement
Provide a balanced discussion by exploring both sides of the argument. While you've done this, ensure your conclusion unequivocally states your position to reinforce the response to the task.
Coherence & Cohesion
Make use of linking words and transitional phrases to guide the reader through your argument and improve flow. Your essay shows a good use of these, but aim for variety and precision in their application.
Task Achievement
Support main points with specific examples and evidence. You’ve provided some examples, but further specificity could enhance your argument's strength and relevance.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider paragraphing for clear separation of ideas. Each paragraph should present and elaborate on a single main idea, supported by specific examples or explanations.