IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Nowadays, instead of locally sourced produce, many supermarkets sell a variety of imported foods from all around the world. Does this advantage outweigh the disadvantage?

Nowadays, imported
food
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 has become easier to find in supermarkets.
However
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,
this
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 has become a contentious issue because it is slowly replacing local
food
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.
This
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 disadvantage outweighs the advantages.
Although
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 importing may suffice the national needs of consumption, it would negatively affect the local economy.
Due to
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 the increased population, it may be challenging for a
country
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 to suffice the national consumption solely by producing alone.
Hence
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, the presence of imports would benefit the government to fill the gaps.
Furthermore
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, Given the capacity of mass production, importing from another
country
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 may be an option.
For instance
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, Thailand is known for producing rice efficiently;
thus
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, it would be better to import rice from Thailand on a large scale to fulfil national consumption.
On the other hand
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, promoting activities of import may reduce the
demand
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 for
products
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 manufactured domestically.
Moreover
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, the impact of imported foods on a large scale is making domestic
products
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 more vulnerable and causing people, like farmers, to lose their jobs. The government needs to regulate the import quota because it helps to protect the market for domestic
products
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. Suppose a
country
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 overfloods with imported
food
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;
therefore
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, the
country
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 would lose its potential revenues from the public.
For instance
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, statistics show the increased
demand
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 for imported fruits from Thailand affects local farmers in Indonesia by 30%. In summary, more imported
food
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 in supermarkets compared to local
food
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 creates more harm than good.
Although
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 it satisfies the increased
demand
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 for imported
food
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, it harms local producers as it reduces the
demand
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 for domestic
products
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.

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Task Response
Ensure a clear stance is presented from the beginning, and maintain consistency in supporting this stance throughout. This improves clarity and strength of argument.
Task Response
Include a wider range of specific examples to support main points. This adds depth and persuasiveness to your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a variety of linking words and phrases to ensure smooth transitions between ideas and paragraphs, enhancing the flow of your essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
Strive for a more dynamic range of sentence structures to add interest and sophistication to your writing.
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