Some believe that installing CCTVs in high crime areas will help to reduce crime. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?
Some individuals feel that it would be helpful to install security
cameras
in dangerous areas
in order to diminish crime
rate. This
essay will highlight some of the benefits and drawbacks that result from such
an approach.
To begin
with the positives, a crucial advantages that arises
from Change the verb form
arise
this
approach is that it will definitely reduce acts of crime
. This
is because criminals are more conscious about what they are determined to do and they are more likely to think twice. Otherwise
, if they comin
a Correct your spelling
comin'
commit
crime
, they will ensure that sooner or later they will be cought
by police officers. Correct your spelling
caught
Besides
that, this
trend might deter wrongdoers and junkies from using, saling
, and trafficking narcotics in public places Correct your spelling
selling
such
as parks and alleis
notably in slums. Correct your spelling
allies
alleys
Hence
, by puting
in CCTVs, public and Correct your spelling
putting
specially
residents of poor Replace the word
especially
areas
would probably feel safer than before.
On the other hand
, installation of surveillance cameras
in crime
areas
presents some problems. For instance
, citizens might argue that they have lost their privicy
by being monitored. The reason for Correct your spelling
privacy
this
is that it is obviously an opposite act of human rights. Another significant disadvantages of using such
cameras
is that they are costly for governments. To make matters worse, there is no guarantee that cameras
will not be stolen or broken by highly professional thefts. Consequently
, it also
might be a waste of money.
In conclusion, despite the benefits of putting security cameras
on in certain crime
areas
that offers
less violence and drug-related issues, the drawbacks of spending too much money and invading humans first rights should be taken into account.Change the verb form
offer
Submitted by shamim1999
on
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Task Achievement
The essay addresses the topic of CCTVs in high crime areas, but the supporting examples and details for both advantages and disadvantages are not fully developed. To enhance your score, try to elaborate more on each point with specific, real-world examples that clearly demonstrate the impact of CCTVs.
Coherence and Cohesion
The structure of the essay is apparent, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, to improve coherence, work on smoother transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs to link ideas more effectively. Use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to improve the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
While the essay has an introduction and conclusion, they could be improved to more precisely state the essay's main argument and summarize the key points more effectively. In the introduction, make the thesis statement clearer. The conclusion should succinctly encapsulate the advantages and disadvantages discussed, offering a more decisive stance.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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