IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The plans below show the layout of the ground floor of a museum in 1990 and in 2010.

The two plans
illustrates
Correct subject-verb agreement
illustrate
show examples
 changes to
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 ground
floor
Use synonyms
 of
museum
Correct article usage
the museum
show examples
 from 1990 to 2010. The most significant alteration was the location of
statue
Correct article usage
the statue
show examples
. In
2010
Punctuation problem
2010,
show examples
 it had been moved to the centre of
ground
Correct article usage
the ground
show examples
floor
Use synonyms
 from the left side of
stairs
Correct article usage
the stairs
show examples
.
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
 there was
Linking Words
instead
Punctuation problem
, instead
show examples
 of
Archeology
Correct determiner usage
the Archaeology
show examples
 gallery, a Children’s interactive zone and
Poster
Correct article usage
a Poster
show examples
 display area on the right part of
Use synonyms
floor
Correct article usage
the floor
show examples
. The natural history room was located on the left part of the building,
while
Linking Words
 the archaeology gallery was on the right side.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
there was built a lift
Correct word order
a lift was built
show examples
 between
Local
Correct article usage
the local
show examples
 history room and
Gift
Correct article usage
the gift
show examples
 shop
that
Correct pronoun usage
, which
show examples
 was enlarged and became
also
Linking Words
 a Cafe.
Therefore
Linking Words
, some of
walls
Correct article usage
the walls
show examples
 from
Local
Correct article usage
the Local
show examples
 history room to
Children’s
Correct article usage
the Children’s
show examples
 interactive zone had been taken down.
However
Linking Words
 Museum office did not change the location, Reception Counter moved closer to the expanded entrance.
Overall
Linking Words
,
ground
Correct article usage
the ground
show examples
floor
Use synonyms
 of
museum
Correct article usage
the museum
show examples
 has undergone a number of major alterations
since
Change preposition
from
show examples
 1990 to 2010.

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task response
Write the first line in a more clear way. Use: 'The two plans show the changes in the ground floor of a museum from 1990 to 2010.'
task response
Give a more full overview. Say 2 or 3 main changes in one short part after the first line.
coherence and cohesion
Some ideas are not fully clear. For example, 'there was instead of Archeology gallery' is hard to follow. Make each change one clear sentence.
coherence and cohesion
Group changes by area: right side, left side, and center. This will make the report easier to read.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words in a simple way: 'On the right', 'On the left', 'In the center', 'Also', 'By 2010'.
task response
Check grammar in key noun groups: 'the layout of the ground floor', 'the center of the ground floor', 'the museum office did not change location'. Errors make ideas less clear.
task response
You give an overview and point out the main change with the statue.
task response
You include many key changes, such as the new lift, the bigger gift shop and cafe, and the new children area.
coherence and cohesion
The report has a clear start and end.
coherence and cohesion
You use some linking words like 'Moreover', 'Additionally', and 'Overall'.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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