IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The plans below show the layout of the ground floor of a museum in 1990 and in 2010.

#plans #show #layout #ground #floor #museum
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The two schemes beneath present the arrangement of the ground floor of a museum in 1990 and in 2010. There were a few changes
with
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apply
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the most obvious being the archaeology gallery which
was entirely rebuild
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was entirely rebuilt
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in
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into
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 two rooms called
Children’s
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the Children’s
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 interactive zone and Poster display area. In 2010,
reception
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the reception
a reception
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 which was in the corner on
left
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the left
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 side was
expended
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expanded
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 and relocated near
Entrance
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the Entrance
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.
Moreover
, the main entrance was widened.
In contrast
,
stairs
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the stairs
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 remained the same,
although
 the statue was displaced closer to them. Another major switch is that the walls of
local
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the local
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 history room were removed and there is no door connecting to another accommodation. In 2010 a lift was added in the building on the left side between
Gift
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the Gift
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 shop and
Natural
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the Natural
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 history room.
Also
, the accommodation near
stairs
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the stairs
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 was enlarged and now there is a café.
Overall
, the ground floor of the museum has undergone a lot of changes
of
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in
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 infrastructure since
last
 decade including
chambers
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chamber
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 size and positioning of some of the amenities.
Submitted by acaitaz on

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task achievement
Consider elaborating further on the changes by explaining their potential significance or impact on museum visitors.
coherence cohesion
Ensure greater clarity by enhancing the logical transitions between paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, framing the comparison effectively.
task achievement
Most main ideas are well-supported by descriptions of specific changes to the museum layout.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a logical structure, generally reflecting the changes over time well.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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