IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything, they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statemen

#future #nobody #newspapers #books #statemen
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Nowadays, Technology is changing rapidly. The internet plays a significant part in using search
engine
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engines
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. Where we all have access to the internet, in my opinion,
although
, the segment of people still give value a books,
they
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the
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 move toward free online media is inevitable.
To begin
, people usually like to read a book or newspaper with coffee in the morning, they get
up to date
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up-to-date
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news
 from around the world and check e-mails
while
 they still read a print newspaper because texture and smell are families. All together, they reduce
eyes
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eye
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 strain because blue light from the cellphone can harm
eyes
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the eyes
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 if used
a
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for a
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long time.
On the other hand
, the majority of people like to read
a
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news
a piece of news
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news
 through online media channels as easily
than
Change preposition
as
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 paper;
moreover
, it is free. You just have a smartphone and internet to access the website, blog, and the official
news
. They have developed the function to notice
about
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apply
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the
news
 in
real time
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real-time
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. Using online channels is convenient as it is free, you can read anywhere,
it
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and it
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 is environment friendly
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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mean
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means
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 trees are not and using it
reduce
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reduces
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 waste.
Additionally
, there is a lot of fake
news
 so the trouble distinguishing between what is real and what is not is real. In conclusion, I am totally for reading on the cellphone because it is
fast
Add an article
a fast
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 way and I do not carry paper with me. Online newspapers have
benefit
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benefits
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 but if you use the smartphone over 7-8 hours per day it won’t be in the future.
Submitted by chompoo34888 on

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task achievement
Make your introduction clearer by presenting your opinion more precisely. Try to establish a clear thesis statement that responds directly to the prompt.
coherence & cohesion
Discuss each viewpoint in a separate paragraph to ensure your essay has a clearer structure, which will make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
task achievement
Include more specific examples and evidence to support your points. This will make your argument stronger and more convincing.
coherence & cohesion
Make sure your conclusion summarizes your main points and clearly restates your position. This ensures a strong finish to your essay.
general
Proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure for a more professional and polished presentation.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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