Sports is one of the most important draws on television today. Some people argue that the practice of showing sports on television is to blame for the poor health of young generation by encouraging them to watch rather than partake in physical activity. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?
The most favourable program on
television
is exercise nowadays. There are many communities who are against this
and believe television
programs are better to persuade youth to participate in actual events rather than watching them. This
essay will argue why this
idea is not totally acceptable despite many drawbacks.
The majority of people are interested in doing physical activities throughout the day as it is refreshing. They strongly criticize the media for showing a great deal of sports programs and justify that teenagers spend a lot of time gazing at television
which brings about poor sight. Moreover
, they assume sitting at home and watching television
makes them inactive as we know the more you stimulate your mobility the better physical gestures you will get and lack of it makes youth more laid-back along with
deprivation from their own daily tasks. Therefore
, they believe observing more exercise events harms these generations's health, badly.
Considering the whole world in one
picture, we infer that there is not one
order for the universe and one
has to overview from different angles and perspectives. In spite of having side effects when one
overdoes it , television
programs teach a variety of useful materials to the younger generation. In addition
, assume that one
is not a man of sport, but rather prefers to see them on electronic devices , should they ban themselves from observing? In a nutshell, even though physically conducting sports leads to positive body performance and health in the long term, we ought to consider freedom of choice.
in conclusion, this
essay argues that people who only approve of physical activity and criticize the media for it, have a flawed understanding of this
issue and they may need to consider more factors and consequences. I partially believe in this
point of view and assume television
must continue the trend for those youth who are not interested in an actual activity or even may not have the opportunity to do so.Submitted by keyhan454 on
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task achievement
You've done a fair job presenting the argument, but there's room to deepen the engagement with the topic. Try to explore the question more thoroughly by introducing a wider range of arguments and examples.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should more explicitly state your opinion on the topic.
task achievement
Develop your main points with specific, detailed examples. General statements need to be supported with concrete evidence or instances that illustrate your point.
coherence cohesion
Work on strengthening the logical flow of your essay. Use a range of cohesive devices beyond simple connectors like 'moreover' and 'in addition'. Experiment with synonymy, ellipsis, and substitution for smoother transitions.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and range of vocabulary. Consistent minor errors and limited vocabulary range can impact the clarity of your ideas and arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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