Scientists agree that people are harming their health by eating too much fat food. Some people think that the solution to this problem is to make people aware of the problems. Others think education will not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#scientists #people #health #food #education #work

Nowadays individuals are consuming an excess of fast

food

which is causing diseases that damage their health. It is evident that there are split ideas regarding whether educating them could be an optimal decision, meanwhile, others believe that education will prove ineffective. Personally, I support the view that teaching can help to decrease the number of illnesses that result from using

fat

Replace the word

fatty

show examples

food

. Those who advocate that guidance is not an appropriate way to avoid the problem may argue that if a person does not have the desire to cease consuming unhealthy

food

, no guide is capable of providing assistance. There might be rational reasons because humanity’s willpower plays an essential role when making decisions. Even though individuals have watched a number of educational videos, if a person does not want it from inside, they are useless.

On the other hand

, other group holds the view that instructions about the importance of balanced diets can address the issue. To put it more simply, if there are organized educational initiatives that focus on teaching children and adults about nutrition and how to read

food

labels, it can provide assistance to others to know the consistency of the

food

that they are eating every day. What is more, they can differentiate what is a beneficial ingredient and what is a detrimental one.

For instance

according to

the research conducted by the National Institute of Health (NIH), people who knew about balanced nutrition experienced reduced illness than not-educated people.

Therefore

, it is clear why some people gravitate towards

this

point of view. In conclusion, after analyzing both sides of an argument, I believe that acquiring knowledge about proportionate diet can help to reduce illness generated by utilizing junk foods.

Submitted by omarovaa.access on Fri Feb 16 2024

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Task Achievement

Work on integrating more specific examples into your essay. While you cite a study by the National Institute of Health (NIH), further examples or data could strengthen your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion

Consider varying your sentence structures for a more engaging read. Using a mix of simple, compound, and complex sentences can enhance the readability and sophistication of your essay.

Coherence and Cohesion

While your introduction and conclusion are well-presented, ensure every paragraph has a clear main idea supported by detailed explanations or examples to maintain focus and strengthen your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

detrimental
awareness campaigns
behavior change
socioeconomic factors
nutritional education
balanced diet
food labels
dietary habits
policy interventions
public health
heart disease
diabetes
obesity
human psychology
food marketing
nutrition

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Scientists agree that people are harming their health by eating too much fat food. Some people think that the solution to this problem is to make people aware of the problems. Others think education will not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

You are renting a flat from an agency. Your contract was for one year but you need to leave the flat two months early. Write a letter to the agency. In your letter • introduce yourself • ask to leave the flat before the contract finishes •explain why you need to break the contract.

Some people think it is more important to spend money on road and motorways rather than on public transport systems such as railways and trams.

With the widespread use of the Internet, more people choose to work or study from home. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadaysn teenagers are suffering from a lot of pressure.Write an esay of about 250 words to list the causes of teen pressure and give solutions to overcome?