The only way to improve road safety is to have stricter punishments for driving offenders. To what extent do you agree or disagree

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Many
people
believe that stricter penalties for driving violators are the only way to improve
traffic
safety
.
While
I agree that stricter penalties can be an effective way to deter
people
from breaking road
traffic
laws, I believe that there are better methods to protect the rights of participant
traffic
. On the one hand, it is reasonable that enforcement of regulations can act as a deterrent to those intending to violate the law.
This
leads to
people
seriously obeying
traffic
safety
regulations to avoid being fined large amounts of money.
For example
, in Vietnam, a motorbike driver who does not wear a helmet will be fined from 200,000 VND to 400,000 VND or depending on different circumstances, a heavier fine may be imposed. To summarize, law enforcement has partly improved road
traffic
safety
.
On the other hand
, ensuring
people
's
safety
is not only about deterring the law, but
also
about raising
people
's awareness of the consequences of violating driving laws
,
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or promoting the
use
of driving systems. public transport.
This
leads
people
to
use
public transportation to travel more.
For example
,
people
can
use
high-speed trains or buses to avoid
traffic
jams, leading to accidents. To summarize, raising
people
's awareness about using public transportation is
also
a good measure. In conclusion, I believe that stricter penalties are not the only way to reduce driving violations. Measures, including raising public awareness and promoting the
use
of public transport systems, can
also
contribute to maintaining road
safety
.
Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on

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Task Achievement
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Task Achievement
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Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and is well-developed. This can be achieved by using more varied sentence structures and linking phrases to connect ideas.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your conclusion can be improved by restating your main points more clearly and offering a stronger final thought or recommendation.
Coherence & Cohesion
Make sure your essay has a clear and logical flow by organizing it into well-structured paragraphs. Each paragraph should begin with a clear topic sentence.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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