The chart below shows numbers of adults participating in different major sports in one area, in 1997 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#numbers #adults #sports #area #summarise #information #features #comparisons

the bar chart depicts

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

information about the youngsters who were involved in participating in major sports activities both in 1997 and

Change preposition

apply

show examples

2017 after the analysis, the

number

of participants going for

gentle

Add an article

a gentle

the gentle

show examples

walk

Fix the agreement mistake

walks

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had

huge

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a huge

show examples

influence, the

number

in 1997

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

exactly 50 thousand

while

that for in 2017 the

number

show upward trend after people who

are participating

Wrong verb form

participated

show examples

Add an article

the

show examples

gym saw a negligible difference between them close to almost 40 thousand in total in both of the years but for jogging

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show examples

gradual increased happened in the year of 2013 and move little upward

furthermore

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

basketball and cricket both showed an opposite trend

moreover

, for basketball the

number

of participants playing it close to 20 thousand in total in the

last

year (2007) whilst for cricketers the same pattern

Wrong verb form

was

show examples

followed

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

but

this

time it was the first year (1997)

however

, people who were participating in football and hiking did not any fluctuation and remained the same

thoughout

Correct your spelling

throughout

the period

overall

, it is clearly manifested that sports

include

Wrong verb form

including

show examples

gentle walking remained first in the category of sports

while

football and hiking remained the second spot in

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

activities

Submitted by abdulahad08600 on Sat Feb 17 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words number with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 3 times.

▼

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

194 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The chart below shows numbers of adults participating in different major sports in one area, in 1997 and 2017. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The plans below show the South Wing of Walton Museum in 2008 and in 2012 after it was redeveloped. You should write at least 150 words.

Students perform better in schools when they are rewarded rather than punished. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that the detailed criminal description on newspaper and TV has bad consequences, so this kind of information should be restricted on media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?