the only way to improve road safety is to have stricter punishments for driving offenders. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, a rising number of citizens are worried about road safety. It is the opinion of
this
writer that imposing stricter penalties for driving violators is the not only way to enhance awareness of participating in
traffic
and reduce the number of
traffic
accidents
,
although
it could be somewhat efficient. It is crucial to understand that stricter punishments are a deterrent to those who have the ability or intention to violate the law. Punishment may be in the form of money, imprisonment, confiscation of a license, or making the insurance high.
For instance
, driving through red lights in Vietnam will result in a fine of 800,000
VND
to 1 million
VND
for motorbikes and 4 million
VND
to 6 million
VND
for cars.
As a consequence
,
traffic
participants will have the fear of being fined and will not violate regulations. Another key component of the case for stringent punishments for
traffic
crimes can be an effective solution to minimize
traffic
accidents
.
Due to
the fact that most fatal
accidents
in the past stemmed from lax
traffic
laws. In
this
situation, the government has changed
traffic
laws to be stricter.
Consequently
, the total number of
traffic
accidents
which are compiled until the end of 2023 has decreased significantly. ​
To sum up
, stricter punishments could be the best way to handle road safety violations, but only to a certain extent. Even though, drivers should be educated
then
given a warning for minor human errors and
finally
strict punishment for violation of rules.
Submitted by  11E4 Community on

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task achievement
Make sure your essay addresses the prompt directly throughout. While you discuss the importance of stricter punishments, also consider contrasting viewpoints or additional measures to enhance road safety, to fully address the extent of agreement or disagreement.
task achievement
Enhance the clarity of your main ideas by starting each paragraph with a clear topic sentence. Then, follow up with explanations, examples, and a concluding sentence that wraps up the paragraph's main idea.
task achievement
Develop your paragraphs more fully by expanding on each point with specific details and examples. This will help substantiate your arguments and make them more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of your essay by ensuring that paragraphs are well-organized and ideas progress smoothly from one to the next. Use a range of cohesive devices such as linking words (furthermore, however, therefore) appropriately.
coherence cohesion
Maintain a clear and consistent structure throughout your essay. This includes having a distinct introduction that sets the stage for your discussion, body paragraphs that explore individual points, and a conclusion that summarizes your arguments and restates your stance.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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