MANY PEOPLE THINK THAT MUSEUMS AND GALLERIES SHOULD ONLY SHOW WORK FROM LOCAL ARTISTS RATHER THAN WORK FROM OTHER COUNTRIES. DO YOU AGREE?

#people #museums #galleries #show #work #artists #countries

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Art is an essential part of every

country

Use synonyms

in the world. Some people believe that

museums

Use synonyms

and

galleries

Use synonyms

should only showcase the

works

Use synonyms

of local

artists

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of foreign

artists

Use synonyms

. In my opinion, I completely believe in

this

Linking Words

notion.

To begin

Linking Words

with, the heritage and culture of a

country

Use synonyms

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

be seen through artworks.

Galleries

Use synonyms

and

museums

Use synonyms

are a good platform to showcase

this

Linking Words

. If the government will only allow the

works

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of local

artists

Use synonyms

museums

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and

galleries

Use synonyms

, they will be able to promote and show the unique culture, traditions, and identity of the nation.

Moreover

Linking Words

, there is a high chance for local

artists

Use synonyms

to establish themselves within the community. Supporting their

works

Use synonyms

would

also

Linking Words

give them a chance to be recognized worldwide.

Thus

Linking Words

, displaying their

works

Use synonyms

galleries

Use synonyms

museum

Fix the agreement mistake

museums

show examples

would greatly help local

artists

Use synonyms

In addition

Linking Words

to that,

this

Linking Words

could

also

Linking Words

boost

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

tourism in the

country

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, a lot of people from overseas travel in order for them to see the incredible

works

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of Picasso.

Thus

Linking Words

, showcasing the

works

Use synonyms

of local

artists

Use synonyms

could gain

such

Linking Words

popularity,

hence

Linking Words

increasing the tourism and economic growth of the

country

Use synonyms

Lastly

Linking Words

, interest in art nowadays is undeniably decreasing.

To have

Change the verb form

Having

show examples

this

Linking Words

kind of support could motivate local

artists

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and emerging talents to continue their work, which helps in preserving the culture. In conclusion, though there are drawbacks associated with supporting only local

artists

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galleries

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and

museums

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, we have to consider that its advantages could benefit local

artists

Use synonyms

and the

country

Use synonyms

in the long run.

Submitted by yoko.onerom on Sun Feb 18 2024

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Language Use

To enhance your score further, try expanding the range of your lexical resource by incorporating more sophisticated vocabulary and varied sentence structures. This will make your argument more compelling and engaging.

Structure

For coherence and cohesion, make sure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next with clear, logical transitions. Consider adding or emphasizing linking phrases to better connect ideas within and between paragraphs.

Argument

Regarding task achievement, while you've provided a clear position and supported it with relevant examples, striving for deeper analysis and including counter-arguments could enrich your essay. Addressing opposing views and refuting them strengthens your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural Heritage
Regional Culture
Economic Benefits
Local Talent
Authentic Local Art
Diverse Perspectives
Mutual Understanding
Balanced Approach
Cultural Exchange
Artistic Styles
Innovations
Global Reputation
Exhibitions
Preservation
Promotion
Unique Aspects
Educational Experience
Mutual Understanding
Tolerance
Stimulating the Economy

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MANY PEOPLE THINK THAT MUSEUMS AND GALLERIES SHOULD ONLY SHOW WORK FROM LOCAL ARTISTS RATHER THAN WORK FROM OTHER COUNTRIES. DO YOU AGREE?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that instead of preventing climate change, we need to find a way to live with it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians. What are the reasons for this? Is it a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that professionals such as doctors and engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some culture children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disavdantages of giving children this message?