Leisure is a growing industry, but people no longer entertain themselves as much as they used to because the use of modern technology has made them less creative. Agree or disagree?

#leisure #industry #people #technology

Technology

advancement has an impact on how

people

spend their leisure time. There is an argument stating the increasing number of modern

technology

usage makes the level of creativity downfall than before. In my opinion, I do not agree with

this

statement. Even though in fact, there are definitely changes in the way

people

entertain themselves

due to

technological advances, it does not mean humans will become less creative. Nowadays,

technology

enables us to learn new skills easily

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and provides

people

with numerous platforms to encourage creativity. An innovation breakthrough in

technology

like smartphones and the internet makes it easier for mankind to acquire new skills and hobbies. In

this

modern era,

people

can easily join online classes discussing topics they are interested in.

For instance

, we can study digital marketing on YouTube, join online

boothcamp

Correct your spelling

boot camp

Bootcamp

, or even follow free classes provided by Udemy.

This

way is totally easier than before when

people

had to pay the amount of money and commute to join

a live sessions

Correct the article-noun agreement

a live session

live sessions

show examples

of class.

Moreover

, these days, the internet enables us to access many platforms that either directly or indirectly influence how to be more creative. From YouTube and TikTok, we can watch videos stimulating our

Fix the agreement mistake

brains

show examples

brain

Fix the agreement mistake

brains

show examples

to think out of the box to create content that can attract audiences. In sum, it is true that

technology

change how

people

use their leisure time.

However

, I believe it is false if we say that

technology

can make

human-less

Correct your spelling

humans

show examples

creative. In fact,

people

can be more creative

due to

easy access to knowledge because of

technology

Submitted by mmmuuu on Sun Feb 18 2024

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task response

To improve your score in task response, ensure that your essay not only presents a clear position throughout the response but also fully develops all parts of the task. Consider expanding on how technology might also challenge creativity in some contexts, offering a more balanced view before reinforcing your stance.

coherence and cohesion

Consider varying your sentence structures and linking words more to enhance the cohesion of your essay. Transition smoothly between paragraphs by using a wider range of cohesive devices and topic sentences that clearly signal the main idea of each paragraph.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

passive consumption
instant gratification
creative content creation
problem-solving skills
streaming services
social media platforms
online tutorials
enhancing creativity
digital age
technological advancements
cognitive skills
innovation
interactive platforms
virtual reality

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Leisure is a growing industry, but people no longer entertain themselves as much as they used to because the use of modern technology has made them less creative. Agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

“Overall, the widespread use of the internet has a mostly positive effect on life in today's world." Use reasons and details to support your opinion.

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Robots and artificial intelligence are being developed to replaced in the workplace. Why isnthis happening? Do you think this will have a positive or negative impact in society?

Increasing number of people are choosing cosmetology surgery to improve their appearance. What are the reasons? Do you think is it a positive or negative development?