Some children spend hours every day on the smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
It is often seen that certain
parents
give access to Use synonyms
smartphones
to their Use synonyms
children
. Personally, I feel the main reasons for Use synonyms
this
are an increase in Linking Words
parents
' work Use synonyms
hours
which don't have Use synonyms
time
to watch their kids and interesting content Use synonyms
that is
available on kids' phones. I Linking Words
therefore
feel Linking Words
this
is a negative Linking Words
development
, particularly for their growth. I will explain my reasons in Use synonyms
this
essay.
First and foremost, it is commonly seen that Linking Words
children
who spend Use synonyms
hours
every day on their Use synonyms
smartphones
are the younger ones and still need companionship from their Use synonyms
parents
. Working Use synonyms
parents
often leave their younger Use synonyms
children
with their older Use synonyms
children
who are not in the role of watching their siblings because they have no Use synonyms
time
to keep an eye on their younger kids. Use synonyms
Thus
, Linking Words
for instance
, whenever the younger ones are in tantrums, the older ones often give the smartphone to their sibling so that they can be quiet. In fact, one of the reasons that Linking Words
children
can be in tantrum mode and ask to give the smartphone to them is there are many contents that seem more interesting to them than playing with their friends. Use synonyms
Thus
, Linking Words
this
case often happens because of the increasing working Linking Words
hours
of the Use synonyms
parents
and the lack of supervision of their Use synonyms
children
.
Use synonyms
Secondly
, in my opinion, Linking Words
this
has a negative impact, especially on the Linking Words
children
's motor and brain Use synonyms
development
. Use synonyms
Children
who are still under companion are those who are still in growth age so every single aspect of their life can affect their Use synonyms
development
. Use synonyms
For example
, Linking Words
children
who spend Use synonyms
hours
every day on their Use synonyms
smartphones
tend to have lower attention and movement than those who choose to play with their friends Use synonyms
instead
. Linking Words
This
can affect their brain and skeleton Linking Words
development
. Use synonyms
Consequently
, their growth is slower than other Linking Words
children
and may affect their health when they grow older. Use synonyms
Thus
, spending most of the Linking Words
time
playing on Use synonyms
smartphones
is bad for Use synonyms
children
.
In conclusion, I feel that there are clear disadvantages to allowing Use synonyms
children
to spend their Use synonyms
time
on their Use synonyms
smartphones
every day. The main drawback is Use synonyms
children
's health may decrease as they are older because their body Use synonyms
development
is affected by playing Use synonyms
smartphones
most of the Use synonyms
time
. The question reminds us that Use synonyms
parents
must supervise their Use synonyms
children
's actions despite their working Use synonyms
hours
.Use synonyms
Submitted by amaliasekar30 on
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task achievement
Ensure a clear position throughout the essay. Although your stance is mentioned, reinforcing it in every paragraph could enhance clarity.
task achievement
Incorporate more specific examples to support your arguments. Personal anecdotes or hypothetical scenarios can make your points more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
While your essay has a logical structure, more sophisticated linking words could improve the flow and cohesion between ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Consider a short summary of your main points in the conclusion to reinforce your argument and provide a stronger closure.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.