Some sports are extremely dangerous but many people still like them very much. Why do people take part in dangerous sports? Give some suggestions on how to deal with these dangers.

Certainly, there are many different
sports
all around the
world
, and the interest
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
games among
people
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
become increased.
However
, Some
people
believe that not all
sports
are entertaining and safe for physical well-being, but
still
Add a comma
still,
show examples
due to
craziness, some individuals take part in dangerous
sports
. In
this
essay, I will explain why
people
prefer challenging
sports
over others, and suggest the possible solution that might be taken to deal with
this
complex matter. There are numerous games which are dangerous for physical well-being.
Firstly
,
cricket
is the most famous sport all around the
world
, loved by all age groups
people
. In
cricket
, the hard ball is made up of leather,
used
Correct word choice
and used
show examples
for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
bowling. The ball is too strong, it can break the bones of batsmen easily. In 2002,
for instance
, the Australian cricketer, Phillip Hughes died during
test
Add an article
a test
show examples
match, because
ball
Add an article
the ball
show examples
hit
head
Correct pronoun usage
their head
his head
her head
show examples
badly.
However
, the doctor called for his death immediately.
Although
It’s a dangerous game,
people
are still die-heart
fan
Fix the agreement mistake
fans
show examples
of
cricket
. The attraction to dangerous
sports
can be attributed to various factors,
such
as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social pressure, and the allure of pushing personal limits. Despite the risks involved, individuals are drawn to the adrenaline rush and sense of achievement that comes with participating in
such
sports
.
Secondly
, football is
also
the most popular game all around the
world
, including 11
players
. In football,
players
often sustain injuries
while
attempting to score goals
due to
collisions with each other. But whenever
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the FIFA
World
Cup
held
Add a missing verb
is held
show examples
, all individuals around the
world
moves
Change the verb form
move
show examples
to the hosted country and enjoy
to watch
Change the verb form
watching
show examples
the live matches with their loved ones. In order to resolve these issues. The
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
federation is working continuously to
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
a life of the athletes, who are playing for their beloved country.
However
, the
cricket
administrative body called the International
Cricket
Council
ensure
Correct subject-verb agreement
ensures
show examples
that all
players
have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
safety
essential
Fix the agreement mistake
essentials
show examples
, like elbow and knee
pad
Fix the agreement mistake
pads
show examples
, and
made
Wrong verb form
makes
show examples
the helmet compulsory for the
betsmen
Correct your spelling
batsmen
batsman
, even
the
Correct word choice
if the
show examples
bowler is a spinner.
On the other hand
, the coach of football must ensure that the
players
are hydrated and are fully equipped with
essentials
Change the noun form
essential
show examples
items. Cooling down and stretching
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
also
important for
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
players
a player
show examples
players
to avoid
heat-up
Add an article
the heat-up
a heat-up
show examples
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
with their opponents. In conclusion, despite the dangers of some
sports
,
people
are loving
Wrong verb form
love
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
and
passionate
Add a missing verb
are passionate
show examples
to become
Change preposition
about becoming
show examples
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
part of their favourite teams.
However
, the
sports
federation
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
to ensure that all
players
are safe during the match, and
they
Correct word choice
that they
show examples
are hydrated and fully equipped with
essentials
Change the noun form
essential
show examples
items, which protect their
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
from injuries.
Submitted by sadiahussain028 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion. To improve, work on creating stronger linkages between your ideas and paragraphs for better coherence. Use transitions and summarize key points at the end of each paragraph.
task achievement
Provide a wider range of examples and delve deeper into the reasons why people engage in dangerous sports. This will help improve task achievement by giving a more complete and comprehensive response to the prompt.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: