Some people think that in order to solve traffic and transportation problems, people should be encouraged to live in cities rather than in suburbs or in the countryside To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is true that
traffic
and transportation are crucial issues that need to be addressed instantly. There is an argument that
people
should be encouraged to live in urban areas
instead
of suburbs. I disagree with the statement
due to
the overpopulation in
cities
and spreading inhabitants to other places. I will elaborate on
this
in my essay below.
Firstly
, the option to not encourage
people
to live in
cities
is reasonable as overpopulation has already appeared in most big
cities
.
This
is because numerous
people
migrate from rural areas in order to have more job opportunities.
For example
, it is prevalent that many conglomerates are located in enormous
cities
such
as New York or Washington for their own sake .
As a result
, a large number of employees who work for them gather in one place, leading to
traffic
congestion during high peak times.
In addition
, the idea of spreading inhabitants is beneficial
due to
reduced population density.
This
can be explained by the fact that if
people
can accept living in the countryside
instead
of depending on big
cities
,
traffic
intensity could go down.
For instance
, when businesses see opportunities in other places, they will allocate factories, and take advantage of labourers and space.
Consequently
, not only urban areas can provide better jobs for workers but locations around the country can offer that. In conclusion, for the reasons I have mentioned above, namely overpopulation and job chances, I maintain that
people
should not be forced to live in
cities
. It is advisable that the government support both individuals to decrease
traffic
jams.
Submitted by nguyetcat.dao on

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task achievement
Be sure to fully develop your ideas. While you have provided some examples, expanding on these with more detail or providing additional examples could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. This will help the reader to follow your argument more easily.
task achievement
Consider adding counterarguments to your essay. Acknowledging opposing viewpoints and refuting them can make your argument stronger and more nuanced.
coherence cohesion
Check for minor grammatical errors and aim for variety in sentence structure to enhance readability and professionalism.
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