Some people believe that it is more important to teach children the literature of their own country than other countries. Do you agree or disagree?

In
this
era, it is apparent that the contemporary heritage consists of diverse cultures,
as well as
it is logically rare to
exist
Verb problem
have
show examples
a pure culture. Despite cultural exchange, some argue that offspring should be taught just in their own country’s
literature
.
However
, I firmly agree with exposing children to different
literature
, through debating the reasons which are expressed in the following. It is universally acknowledged that there is a history and story behind every
literature
, and
also
it is undeniable that some stories have been established in different countries.
Thus
, if a student is being taught just by theirs, learning others’
literature
would be unavoidable. On the other side, in my viewpoint, lessons and
deeper
Correct article usage
a deeper
show examples
appreciations
Fix the agreement mistake
appreciation
show examples
of experience could be gained from fabulous international
literature
,
such
as
masterpieces
Correct article usage
the masterpieces
show examples
of Romeo and Juliet by Shakespeare and War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy. It goes without saying that
necessities
Correct article usage
the necessities
show examples
of studying provenance
literature
are not dropped off by studying international one. By doing so, it could give them a wide perspective of understanding in today’s globalized world.
For example
, it can give an insight to immigrants into the compatibility of coexisting with locals in
destination
Correct pronoun usage
their destination
show examples
,
as well as
connecting and having in common with them.
In addition
,
while
reading various literatures, the language skills would improve.
To conclude
, I totally support the reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
learning
literature
of their own country, but it is crucial for juveniles to be exposed to other countries too.
As a result
, they can be more adopted and open-minded.
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Task Achievement
Expand and clarify your ideas further by providing more distinct, specific examples to support your point about the importance and benefits of learning both national and international literature. While you mention works like 'Romeo and Juliet' and 'War and Peace', integrating examples that explicitly show how they offer lessons or cultural insights could enrich your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on refining your essay's logical flow. While your essay is generally well-organized, there are moments where transitions between ideas could be smoother. Using transitional phrases more effectively can help guide the reader more seamlessly from one point to the next.
Coherence and Cohesion
Review and correct grammatical errors and wording to enhance clarity. Your essay contains several instances of awkward phrasing and grammatical inaccuracies which can detract from the reader's understanding. Consider revising sentences for clarity and simplicity, and make use of tools or resources for grammar checking.
Task Achievement
Practice developing a more engaging and persuasive conclusion. Your concluding paragraph should echo the main points of your essay more forcefully, summarizing your stance and why it's significant in a compelling manner.

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