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Writing Samples
Band 1.5

Discuss advantages and disadvantages of social media!

#media
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Social
media
Use synonyms
 has made a revolution in communications, giving both advantages and disadvantages in the world. On the positive side, it
educate
Change the verb form
educates
show examples
 global connectivity
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and serves as a powerful tool for information dissemination.
However
Linking Words
, the spread of misinformation,
dangerous
Correct word choice
and dangerous
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about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
mental health impacts. The speed at which information travels on social
media
Use synonyms
 has led to the widespread dissemination of misinformation,
undermines
Correct word choice
and undermines
show examples
 trust in reliable sources. Personal data becomes vulnerable to use.
While
Linking Words
 social
media
Use synonyms
 offers unprecedented opportunities for connection and information sharing, it is crucial to decrease its bad effects. Achieving a balanced living with social
media
Use synonyms
 requires responsible usage and critical thinking.
Submitted by 6atb8k on

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Task Achievement
Expand on both advantages and disadvantages of social media more evenly to provide a more balanced discussion.
Task Achievement
Use more specific examples to support your points. This will help to demonstrate your understanding and provide a clearer argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Maintain better logical flow between ideas. This can be achieved by using linking phrases effectively.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider adding an opening introduction sentence that clearly states what the essay will discuss, and a concluding sentence or paragraph that summarizes your main points or provides a final thought.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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