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ONLINE EDUCATION IS BETTER THEN THE FACE TO FACE FO YOU AGREE?

#education #face #fo
Education is the biggest weapon for the development of
students
 which is very useful for everybody's life. It can increase the power of humans and get them ready to face challenges. As we know in
this
 contemporary area, having more knowledge enhances the chance of getting
highly paid
Add a hyphen
highly-paid
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 jobs. I agree with those people who believe that online learning has become increasingly popular among people for a variety of reasons
however
 there are a lot of arguments that can support online learning is better than the face to face. Visual learning can
also
 have a positive effect for
students
 from remote areas, without access to home. One of the main benefits of online learning is the flexibility. they provide, allowing
students
 to set their schedules as they want. It
also
 gives freedom for them in how, what, when, and where they learn.
This
 flexibility includes the ability attend to the class from anywhere in and to suit a busy schedule. they can
work
while
 studying
for
Add the comma(s)
, for
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 instance, some
students
 need to support
of
Change preposition
apply
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families during the educational system. So, flexibility can help them to manage
time
 and attend to both. And make
students
 develop intellectual ability. ' you’ll find virtual classrooms are great for people who are advancing their education
while
 working.' (Elaine Allen and Jeff Seaman2007) it means if you have full-
time
work
 during the day, you can still take online classes in the evening. It doesn’t change in your study.
Therefore
, you don’t need to get a concern. you’ll need to make some sacrifices, sure, but you won’t have to do so when it comes to
work
, your studies, or your family – and that’s what matters.
Secondly
, it provides a wider range of
programs
 and course offerings which can help them to study different types of materials at the same
time
.
Such
 as my older sister can get 3 degrees at the same
time
 in different countries. one of the Indian universities and the other American university at the same
time
.
therefore
, it brings great facilities for pupils who want to get a variety of
programs
 at the
currently
Change the word
current
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. Many universities and colleges now offer a wide range of online degree
programs
, including bachelor’s and master’s degrees, in a variety of fields. At IU, we offer a wide range of cutting-edge tech and business Bachelor's and master’s
programs
, including specialized MBA degrees (.
This
 lets you choose a program that matches your career ambitions. (Jason Silverman, PhD SEPTEMBER 2023)So many
students
 would like to study different subjects because they want to
work
 with kind of career. Member of society needs to engage with different types of
degree
Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
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. online education has a fundamental part
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 leading successful careers in our daily life
Submitted by hsmkashi on

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Task Achievement
Your essay provides a good argument in favor of online education, with a logical structure that guides the reader through your points. However, the introduction lacks a clear thesis statement that directly answers the question. To improve, ensure your introduction explicitly states your position on the topic.
Task Achievement
You've included relevant examples to support your arguments, but some of these examples are not fully elaborated. To improve, expand on how these examples specifically demonstrate the advantages of online education, providing more detail and analysis.
Coherence & Cohesion
While your essay maintains a logical flow, some paragraphs could benefit from clearer topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph. This will help in enhancing the coherence of your arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
The conclusion of your essay could be stronger. It currently lacks a succinct summary of your key arguments and a definitive stance on the topic. Remember, the conclusion should clearly restate your position and summarize the main points made in your essay.
Coherence & Cohesion
To further improve cohesion, consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas within and between paragraphs more smoothly.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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