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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of tourists of visiting a particular Carribean Island between 2010 and 2017. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of tourists of visiting a particular Carribean Island between 2010 and 2017. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tourists #carribean #island #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph provides information about how many tourists visited a certain Carribean Iseland, in the term of seven years.
Overall
Linking Words
, what stands out from the graph is that the total number of passengers
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the Island experienced a rising trend.
In addition
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 at the beginning of the period, the rate for visitors who stayed on cruise ships was
more
Correct word choice
higher
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 than passengers who stayed on
Island
Correct article usage
the Island
show examples
, the figure for
latter
Correct article usage
the latter
show examples
 was higher than
former
Correct article usage
the former
show examples
,
at the end
Linking Words
 of the duration. In 2010, the ratio for tourists who
prefered
Correct your spelling
preferred
 staying in ferries
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 approximately 0.25
million
Use synonyms
, and it saw a
dramatical
Replace the word
dramatic
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 rising trend to peak at about 2
million
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, the rate for those who chose to stay on the land started at under 1
million
Use synonyms
 and followed an upward trend,
Linking Words
finally
Add a comma
finally,
show examples
 it finished at 1.5
million
Use synonyms
. As for
total
Change the article
a total
the total
show examples
 number of visitors, it was at 1
million
Use synonyms
 and
then
Linking Words
rised
Correct your spelling
raised
rose
rise
 to between 2.5 and 3 in 2016. After that, it rose sharply to around 3.5, which was the highest percentage of visitors in all years.
Submitted by sindokhtdadjoo2000 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stayed" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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