The charts below show the total number of applicants the year before and the year after Doolittle University’s social media advertising campaign, organized by age range and how close the applicants live to the university.
The presented bar chart illustrates the
number
of students who applied for Correct article usage
apply
the
Doolittle University from 4 different parts of the world during a given period, starting from 1999.
Correct article usage
apply
Overall
, it can be seen that the figure for the Far East and Africa increased over the given time. While
the Middle East trend experienced some fluctuations, the European Nations
applications declined.
In detail, in 1999, only 30000 of the total students from the European Nations applied, Change noun form
Nations'
whereas
this
number
decreased each year around
1000, and Change preposition
to around
then
in 2003, about 11000 of the total population applied. Moreover
, in 1999 the number
of the
Middle East applicants was 10000, and Correct article usage
apply
then
this
figure experienced some variations. Finally
, in 2003, a peak at 20000 was reached. Furthermore
, in 1999, the number
of pupils from the Far East was 15000, whereas
there was an increase and a peak of 30000 was reached. In 1999, Africa only had 3000 applications, while
this
trend steadily remained until 2001, and then
went up in 2003 at approximately 6000 of the total population.Submitted by royakarimi435 on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas, while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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